RJG Discusses Potential Moves With Brian Cashman

With the winter proceeding at a snail's pace, we decided it was time to call up good friend of the blog, Yankees GM Brian Cashman, to find what was going on. The following is a transcript of our conversation:

BC: Hello?

RJG: Good morrow, sir! How is the Bronniest of the Cashman's doing this fine evening?

BC: Fine I gue . . . wait, what?

RJG: How are you doing this fine evening?

BC: Yeah, I get that, but you just said 'good morrow'. Bid me. You just bid me 'good morrow'.

RJG: And?

BC: Well is it morrow or evening?

RJG: Well, uh . . . hmm . . . you see . . . the thing is, we're in different time zones, so that's probably the cause of the confusion.

BC: I can see your area code on my caller ID, we're not in different time zones.

RJG: That's not really the point is it? I mean, seems like you're just being mean right now for no reason.

BC: I'm sorry. You're right. It's just that I'm frustrated with my Christmas gift ideas and I'm taking it out on you, which is unfair.

RJG: Christmas gifts, huh? I can help you with that. What do you got so far?

BC: Well, for my wife, I was thi . . .

RJG: Ex-wife.

BC: . . . nking . . . wait, what?

RJG: Ex-wife. For your ex-wife you were thinking.

BC: It's not final yet.

RJG: When the New York Post has a whole series of articles on your affair with a crazy woman, it's pretty final.

BC: Are you going to help me or not?

RJG: I can't help you if you won't be honest with me, and that starts with you being honest with yourself.

BC: For my WIFE I was thinking a 3D TV.

RJG: Seems expensive, but you can afford it. What's wrong with that idea?

BC: The 3D thing bugs me a bit.

RJG: Pray tell.

BC: Well, it's just a weird technology. Like, when you watch a movie at home, how often do you sit there and think, 'Man, if only I'd paid an extra $1000 for this TV so I could wear sunglasses while watching it?'.

RJG: How hungover am I?

BC: Like a standard hangover.

RJG: You're right, I never think that.

BC: You see?

RJG: Yeah, that's a dilemma. Well what else you got?

BC: Well, my daughter is a big Star Wars fan and I thought about the Blu-Ray set for her.

RJG: Sounds reasonably thoughtful. What's the issue with that one?

BC: Well, they wen't a little overboard with the extras.

RJG: Totally! I wish George Lucas would stop fussing with the originals and just leave them in the brilliant form we all remember from our childhood!

BC: No, I mean like the deleted scenes and stuff.

RJG: What's wrong with the deleted scenes? Fans love stupid $#!% like that.

BC: Yeah, but there's some weird stuff on there. Like, you know that scene in A New Hope when the guy loading R2 into Luke's X-Wing is all, 'Don't you want a new droid? This one's a piece of crap!' And Luke is all, 'No way man, me and that droid have been through a lot together'?

RJG: Yeah.

BC: Well, in the original scene Luke delivers that line and then knowingly looks at R2. Then they immediately cut to a flashback love scene between the two.

RJG: That's #%&@ing weird.

BC: Yeah, and then there's this really awkward scene where 3PO finds out about it.

RJG: I can see why you don't want your kids exposed to that.

BC: You see my dilemma? I'm pretty much nowhere with this stupid list!

RJG: I know what you can get! You can get Yankees fans a finished roster. Or something like that. You know, doing your job and the like.

BC: It's not all about you, RJG.

RJG: You do know my name isn't RJG, right?

[Click]

Well there you have it folks! The Yankees' winter plans are in process and soon we will all have a team to be proud of.