Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Yanks Beat Rays

The Good

Ivan Nova gave us 7.2 scoreless innings pitching in relief of the rest of the starting rotation. The Yankees scored 5 runs off of Wade Davis.

The Bad

The Yankees scored those 5 runs the old fashioned way, like timely hitting and bunts and $#!%. Nobody wants to see that. Nobody pays $250 per ticket to sit next to a wall that obscures your view to watch small ball. Next time hit some home runs!

The Ugly

After the game, Joe Maddon berated his team for not playing with any heart. One of his players pointed out that this didn't make any sense, as baseball is mainly played with the arms and legs and that, if anything, he should be berating them for not playing with any arms and legs. Hands also play a role. Joe Maddon had no response.

The Rip-off

Not only did the Yankees deprive the overpaying public of any home runs, they deprived the children of any further donations. Why don't they just make that switch to the National League already?!

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 41hr = $82
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 16hr = $32
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 26hr = $52
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 2hr = $4
Jesus Montero 3hr = $6
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $422


Rich Mahogany said...

The Rays played without heart because Nova removed the hearts from their chests, whence they were consumed with mystical fire.

Fernando Alejandro said...

Mystical Nova fire!

Rich Mahogany said...

Not as powerful as Nova Flame.