Friday, September 30, 2011

And it Begins...

Tonight will be the first game of the American League Division Series where one Constantino Chamberlain Sabathia will take on Justin Verlander. The major league season ended yesterday, but the Yankees season ended a week ago when they clinched the division. After this, Yankees fans had to witness something they were largely unfamiliar with: meaningless September baseball. The Yankees fielded more minor leaguers in the last week than the Pirates did all year. But now, the Yankees have to turn everything up a notch and come prepared to face the Tigers. Ladies and Gentlemen, the quest for number 28 is afoot.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Well That Escalated Quickly

The Good

Mark Teixeira's bat got hot right in time for the post season. He hit 2 homeruns, including a grandslam. Jones also hit a homerun, while Betances made his first major league start, going 2 innings and not allowing a run. In the meanwhile, over in Baltimore, the Orioles were playing what must have seemed like the world series to them. When all was said and done, the Red Sox couldn't stave off the Orioles in the 9th, and Papelbon took the loss on a walk-off single by Robert Andino. This now proves that Andino is actually a prophet, having foreseen his future success when he took his profile picture at the beginning of the season:

Picture Source

The Bad

We lost. Not in any real sense, but still.

The Ugly

Dropping a 7 run lead has to go here, but at the point the Rays were rallying, our regulars were on the bench, our bench players were on the field, and our best releivers were at their respective homes, or at least should have been considering that none of them were going to pitch today. You have to tip your hat to the Rays. They came back from a 7 run deficit to win the game in extra innings. It was kind of epic the way the Rays were playing into extra innings while the Red Sox had a rain delay also extending the outcome of the game later into the evening. When all is said and done, the Rays completed their epic surge while the Red Sox completed their epic collapse. I'm sure the Mets could offer some words of consolation in this time.

What a Great Way to End the Season for the Babies

Three homeruns between Teixeira and Andruw Jones. What a great way to end the season for the Children's Health Fund. That's $6 for the babies.

Mark Teixeira 39hr = $78
Curtis Granderson 41hr = $82
Russell Martin 18hr = $36
Alex Rodriguez 16hr = $32
Jorge Posada 14hr = $28
Robinson Cano 28hr = $56
Andruw Jones 13hr = $26
Brett Gardner 7hr = $14
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 6hr = $12
Francisco Cervelli 4hr = $8
Eduardo Nunez 5hr = $10
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 2hr = $4
Jesus Montero 4hr = $8
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $444

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Further Praise of David Robertson

I mentioned earlier that his ERA is at 1.08, but I just noticed that he has exactly 100 strikeouts on the season in 66.2 innings pitched. What a contributor he's turned out to be.

Reeling Yanks Can't Stop Surging Rays (Wink Wink)

The Good

Russel Martin hit a homerun a day after getting thrown out of the game for arguing balls and strikes. It was a solo shot, but in a game where the Yankees didn't do much else it really stands out. Did anyone notice that Dave Robertson's ERA is at 1.08?

The Bad

Rafael Soriano giving up 3 a run homerun comes to mind. After the game, Girardi defended Soriano saying that he's played well for us, and wrote this off as a fluke. What Soriano has he been watching this season?

The Ugly

Russel Martin hit into a triple play, which takes a lot of skill when you really think about it.

Cano and Granderson, where are you at?

Russel Martin hit a homerun to make sure the kids wouldn't leave empty handed, but Cano, who's charity the homerun money goes to, and Granderson, who's our only 40 homerun hitter, have been real quiet of late. There is one more game left, and I demand homeruns!

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 41hr = $82
Russell Martin 18hr = $36
Alex Rodriguez 16hr = $32
Jorge Posada 14hr = $28
Robinson Cano 28hr = $56
Andruw Jones 12hr = $24
Brett Gardner 7hr = $14
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 6hr = $12
Francisco Cervelli 4hr = $8
Eduardo Nunez 5hr = $10
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 2hr = $4
Jesus Montero 4hr = $8
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $438

Monday, September 26, 2011

Yanks Fail to Defeat Rival Rays (Wink Wink)

The Good

Cano continues to hit better than most mere mortals. Did you ever notice that Robinson Cano is an anagram for Superman? No? Well, that's because it's not. But he still has more power than you!

The Bad

Russell Martin got thrown out of the game in the fifth for arguing balls and strikes. He wasn't questioning the strike zone, as much as talking to every pitch, debating the balls on matters of political concern. The Ump couldn't take the inane points Martin kept raising and finally threw him out in the fifth inning. Girardi tried to argue, but once he realized Martin had spent the better part of the game trying to convince various baseballs that the key to creating jobs is eating a low carb diet, he gave up.

The Ugly

The Yankees lost a game in which Farnsworth pitched for the other side. WTF?

Cash Money All-Stars

Remember them? Well, you shouldn't. $2 more for the kids courtesy of Robinson Cano. Will he reach 30 again this season? He better if he cares about his own charity!

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 41hr = $82
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 16hr = $32
Jorge Posada 14hr = $28
Robinson Cano 28hr = $56
Andruw Jones 12hr = $24
Brett Gardner 7hr = $14
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 6hr = $12
Francisco Cervelli 4hr = $8
Eduardo Nunez 5hr = $10
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 2hr = $4
Jesus Montero 4hr = $8
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $436

Sorry For the Delay: Red Sox Series Update

The Good

A lot can be said about the Yankees in this space, but I think the best thing that happened this weekend was that, while we took the series and played well, we didn't dash the Red Sox's playoff chances. I know we would all love to see a monumental collapse, but that's petty small picture stuff. I'd rather have a team like the Red Sox in the playoffs who are limping in than a team like the Rays in the Playoffs who are charging in. Playoff baseball is about who's hot and right now the Red Sox are not. Rather them as potential October competition than a young team that is hungry and playing with fire in their bellies.

The Bad

Losing that game in extras wasn't good, but I can't complain too much. I wish Cano hadn't booted that ball and I wish Nova had pitched ever so slightly better. But truth be told, if Cano cleanly fields that double-play ball the Yankees probably win that game.

The Ugly

After Sunday's nightcap, Scott Proctor was asked how he felt about giving up the winning runs. This was his response:

"Sometimes I cry myself to sleep. Not because I'm sad, but because I have nothing better to do. So I cry myself to sleep. That's what I do."

Needless to say the interview was over.

Show Me the Money

Sorry for the Jerry Maguire reference but I couldn't think of anything else. Jeter, Montero, and Posada each had a single home run in the weekend series. $6 more dollars for the kiddos.

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 41hr = $82
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 16hr = $32
Jorge Posada 13hr = $25
Robinson Cano 27hr = $54
Andruw Jones 12hr = $24
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 6hr = $12
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 5hr = $10
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 2hr = $4
Jesus Montero 4hr = $8
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $430

Friday, September 23, 2011

Colon Explains His Performance

Colon has not been good of late, and he hasn't won a game since August. After the game, RJG caught up with Colon for an explanation:

RJG: Hey Bartolo! You sure suck lately. What gives?

Colon: Pitching isn't something easy to do. You have to block out the distractions when you're on the mound, but sometimes it's just too hard. Like today, before I leave for the park, my wife brushed an eyelash off my face and then blew it away. I was all 'what was that about?' And she's like, 'I made a wish'. So I'm like, 'that's so f#$&@!*g stupid! You think an eyelash is going to grant your wish?! You didn't even say your wish out loud! Is the eyelash a mind reading eye lash? Can it read your thoughts? Is it a magic eyelash, because I'm pretty sure it's just dead hair?! How does it go about granting your wish? Does it have like a Costco card or something? Does it go to Costco to grant the wish from when it read your mind?' I was thinking of that all day and I just couldn't focus on the mound.

RJG: Wow. How'd that go over with your wife?

Colon: Not well. Can I stay with you guys tonight?

RJG: No.

The Oddest Year

The Yankees locked down the division a couple games ago, and now have a week of what amounts to imaginary baseball. Though it will appear they are playing baseball, we'll be seeing a lot of names on the roster that we've never heard of, and numbers on jerseys that are closer to a hundred. But thinking back to the beginning of the seasons, the Red Sox were a lock for the division, the Yankees were the underdogs, the Rays were looking at what to do with their 50 first round draft picks, and the Blue Jays were just happy to be rid of Vernon Wells. The Yankees missed out on Cliff Lee so they turned to the next best thing: signing every veteran who ever threw a ball in the major leagues. This approach landed us Bartolo Colon, and Freddy Garcia who haven't been great of late but essentially are why we've won the division. It also got us Andruw Jones, Eric Chavez, and Russell Martin who have been contributors, and have really helped stabalize this team. The Red Sox if you remember had just traded for Adrian Gonzalez and signed Carl Crawford. If any team was poised to take the division it was them. But baseball is funny that way, and the Yankees really caught lightning in a bottle this year. They essentially took the money ball approach and signed low cost, high-ceiling players and let it play out. I for one did not think Freddy and Bartolo would both make it this far, but here we are in September, and neither are on the DL. Another great development has been Ivan Nova who was sent down mid-season to make room for Hughes, but is back, and has made a strong case to pitch behind Sabathia in the post season. When all is said and done, this has been a remarkable year. I don't know how we'll fare in the post season as our rotation seems in tathers, but with how odd this year has been I wouldn't be surprised if Colon found his 104 mph heat from his Cleveland days, and Freddy Garcia's splitter lands him 9 strikeouts a game here on out. For now, I'm just happy to have the division locked, and we'll see how the rest of the season goes.

So This is What Hung Over Baseball Looks Like

The Good

It was kind of cool seeing the future of the Yankees yesterday. Well, more likely the future of the Pittsburgh Pirates where half of those guys will likely end up, but still, we're seeing the future of some franchise on the field today. One cool thing was seeing Andrew Brackman pitch. He survived 1.1 innings in releif, which is good I suppose. Jesus Montero went 3-3 with a double and Andrew Jones hit a homerun. What fun!

The Bad

The Yankees were clearly disinterested in playing baseball. Girardi didn't even try. The starting lineup had Nunez, Laird and Golson, with Jones covering in the outfield and Posada playing first base. Then after the game got out of hand, Jeter, Teixeira, and Swisher, the only regulars, got pulled for Dickerson, Pena and Romine. Its smart to rest the regulars once the division is a lock, but it must have been a real challenge for Girardi to find the most sober regulars to plug into his lineup. I'm surprised Swisher made it in.

The Ugly

Bartolo Colon was awful. 7 runs in 3 innings just isn't post season material. I know he wants to figure it out, but the season is over next week. We can't hope that some mechanical adjustments will fix him for the ALDS. BTW, that Moore kid is magical.

A Little Something

Andruw Jones made sure the kids at the Children's Health Fund would be supported despite the blowout loss. His homerun adds two more dollars to the CHF.

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 41hr = $82
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 16hr = $32
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 27hr = $54
Andruw Jones 12hr = $24
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 5hr = $10
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 2hr = $4
Jesus Montero 3hr = $6
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $424

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Yanks Do A Lot of Clinching, But Not Lame Clinching Like in Boxing

The Good

The Yankees swept the double-header, winning both games by a score of 2-4. The first game guaranteed the Yankees a playoff spot, the second guaranteed them the division. Sabathia spared the bullpen in the second game, going 7.1 innings and allowing only two runs. Good thing, because at that point Girardi had Posada warming up to pitch. Feeling bad that he had to sit Posada back down, Girardi let him pinch hit in the eighth and Posada delivered the division winning single.

The Bad

Hughes missed another start due to back pain and was administered an epidural. Apparently the back pain began shortly after Hughes's water broke.

The Ugly

Joe Maddon used four relief pitchers in the eighth inning in order to give up two runs. That's not very efficient. He didn't really do it to give up the two runs however, he did it to test whether his pitching coach knew all the names of the relievers in the bullpen, which he did by monitoring the bullpen phone. Some might question whether such a test was appropriate when his team is vying for the Wild Card, but Maddon's genius is not to be questioned, like Theo's.

The Middle Infielders

Nunez had a solo shot in the first game and Cano had a solo shot in the second. $4 more for the kids.

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 41hr = $82
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 16hr = $32
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 27hr = $54
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 5hr = $10
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 2hr = $4
Jesus Montero 3hr = $6
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $422

My Guess for Tomorrow:

Cue the "Posada A Great Yankee" stories.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Yanks Beat Rays

The Good

Ivan Nova gave us 7.2 scoreless innings pitching in relief of the rest of the starting rotation. The Yankees scored 5 runs off of Wade Davis.

The Bad

The Yankees scored those 5 runs the old fashioned way, like timely hitting and bunts and $#!%. Nobody wants to see that. Nobody pays $250 per ticket to sit next to a wall that obscures your view to watch small ball. Next time hit some home runs!

The Ugly

After the game, Joe Maddon berated his team for not playing with any heart. One of his players pointed out that this didn't make any sense, as baseball is mainly played with the arms and legs and that, if anything, he should be berating them for not playing with any arms and legs. Hands also play a role. Joe Maddon had no response.

The Rip-off

Not only did the Yankees deprive the overpaying public of any home runs, they deprived the children of any further donations. Why don't they just make that switch to the National League already?!

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 41hr = $82
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 16hr = $32
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 26hr = $52
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 2hr = $4
Jesus Montero 3hr = $6
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $422

Monday, September 19, 2011

Mo Breaks Record, Yanks Break Twins, Twins Break Burnett

The Good

I think the best part of this game was when the Yankee players sent Rivera back to the mound to receive his ovation. Rivera didn't really seem to know what to do, and it's refreshing to see that sort of discomfort with the spotlight from so dominant a professional athlete. Rivera is like the anti-Floyd Mayweather in that his least favorite topic of conversation seems to be himself.

The Bad

I realize it's a day game, but that park should've been fuller when Mo closed it out.

The Ugly

Let's give this one to Burnett, shall we? Though, perhaps Girardi still letting this guy pitch in the rotation is equally ugly. I realize Girardi may want to keep his starters fresh as we approach October, especially the AARP members, but still. Burnett is practically begging to be placed on the bench and he can't possibly be in contention for a postseason roster spot. At least we know Hughes can pitch out of the bullpen, Burnett gives us no such hope. Remember that train wreck I was telling you all about? Girardi seems to be the only one who doesn't see it.

We Should Just Call This 'The Granderson'

Curtis Granderson hit his 41st homer of the year, and is one shy of the Major League leader Jose Bautista. $2 more for the kids.

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 41hr = $82
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 16hr = $32
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 26hr = $52
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 2hr = $4
Jesus Montero 3hr = $6
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $422

Toronto, eh?

The Good

We took the second game with some good hitting from Granderson and A-Rod who each hit a homerun and drove in 5 of the Yankees 7 runs. Proctor finally pitched a scoreless inning, and of course Mariano Rivera tied Trevor Hoffman's 601 saves.

The Bad

We lost two games, the second with our Triple A lineup playing. Not for nothing, but you can't take Granderson and Teixeira out of the same game you play Pena and Dickerson.

The Ugly

We had Sabathia, Colon and Garcia pitching in this series and not a single one pitched a complete 6 innings. Two of them couldn't even qualify for a start because they couldn't lock down the 5th. In total, these three starters gave up 13 runs off 22 hits. I'll accept a down game, but we need these guys sharp for the post season.

A Weekend of Losses Still Benefits the Children

Granderson hit his 40th homerun of the season, while A-Rod showed why he's still a threat even with a messed up thumb with a homerun of his own. Eric Chavez also hit a homerun off of Blue Jays pitcher Ewan McGregor making 3 homeruns for the babies at the Children's Health Fund.

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 40hr = $80
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 16hr = $32
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 26hr = $52
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 2hr = $4
Jesus Montero 3hr = $6
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $420

Friday, September 16, 2011

Stupid Off-Day Post

Not much has happened in the world of all things Yankees since they lost to Seattle. At least I assume not much has happened, I haven't really bothered to check. Mo is still stuck at a pedestrian 600 saves. Any Trevor Hoffman off the street can get 600 saves. Today Mo will begin anew his quest to be something more than average. CC is looking for his 20th win, which will mark just the 20th time CC has won a game in 2011. Not exactly anything to write home about. Or on this blog for that matter. Off day posts are the worst.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Yanks Refuse to Give Rivera Shot at 601

The Good

Nova pitched well enough to win, giving us 7.1 innings of one run ball.

The Bad

The Yankees only hit well enough to lose. Swish had a solo homer in the 7th to tie the game at one apiece, but that was all the Yankees offense could muster against the vaunted Mariner's pitching staff.

The Ugly

Save the starting pitching performances, not much happened in this game. You know what would have made this game way better? Steroids. If everyone was on steroids, this game would've been awesome! Pitchers throwing 200mph. Hitters hitting ground balls out of the park (I know). Final scores nearing the triple digits. Formerly skinny weaklings lumbering around the diamond, now hulking men. It would be a whole team of Captain Americas. The New York Captain Americas. Instead we mustered a single run against one of the worst teams in all of sports, even pseudo-sports like Golf. Thanks a lot, Bud Selig!

The Donations

Swisher's home run was not only the lone contribution to our offense, but to the children as well. For shame!

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 39hr = $78
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 15hr = $30
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 26hr = $52
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 23hr = $46
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Jesus Montero 3hr = $6
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $414

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Mariano Saves 600

The Good

For starters, all the credit in the world to AJ Burnett who pitched 6 innings with 2 runs with 11 strikeouts. That was more the AJ Burnett we hoped to have all season, but even against this weak Mariners team it was a welcome sight. Montero went 2-4 and continues to show that he can hit at this level. Soriano-Robertson-Rivera locked down the last three innings including a perfect inning out of Soriano and 5 strikeouts between Robertson and Rivera. Rivera locked his 600th save of his career.

The Bad

The coaching staff came to visit AJ in the 3rd thinking that he was injured, but in reality he was just uncomfortable. "My shirt was tucked in a wierd way. It just didn't feel right. When I conferred with Rothschild and Girardi, they were like 'Why don't you untuck it and then retuck it?' So I did, and when I untucked I realized that my shirt had folded over when I tucked it causing the discomfort. Once it was tucked correctly I could throw strikes, and strikes win ballgames, unless they're players strikes in which case there are no ballgames."

Truly words to live by.

The Ugly

While Mariano was locking his 600th save, the Red Sox were trying to upstage him with Wakefields 200th win. The attempt fell short however because 200 wins is like graduating from college. Everyone in your home will congratulate you, but no one else will care.

But in all seriousness, 200 wins with a knuckleball is an impressive feat. Not 600 saves impressive, but impressive in the way fireflies on a summer's night are impressive.

He Can Hit

I'm talking about Cano, who hit a homerun last night and made sure the kids would not go home empty handed. That's 2 more dollars for the Children's Health Fund.

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 39hr = $78
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 15hr = $30
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 26hr = $52
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 22hr = $44
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Jesus Montero 3hr = $6
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $412

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

The King Dethroned

The Good

Phil Hughes pitched 6 innings allowing just 1 run. If he can maintain his consistancy he could very well usurp Burnett for a spot on the post season roster. And speaking of usurping, King Felix got rocked to the tune of 6 runs in 6 innings. Teixeira and Dickerson homered, as Dickerson had one of his best games of the season going 2-4 with 2 RBI's and a stolen base. Also good, Austin Romine got his first big league hit.

The Bad

Though Austin Romine got his first big league hit, he has yet to get into his first big league fight. "I don't know when it will come." Explained Romine. "Will I charge the mound? Run in from the dugout? Will I have to throw a punch, or just shove people? I just don't know what my first big league fight will look like."

The Ugly

Scott Proctor pitched in relief of Hughes and gave up 2 runs. Proctor has made 3 appearances with the Yankees and has given up at least a run in each of them. However, since Proctor threw 102.1 innings in releif for us back in '06 he gets a free pass with me.

Would Someone Please Think of the Children?

Dickerson did. As did Teixeira. $4 more for the babies at the Children's Health Fund.

Mark Teixeira 37hr = $74
Curtis Granderson 39hr = $78
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 15hr = $30
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 24hr = $48
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 22hr = $44
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Jesus Montero 3hr = $6
Chris Dickerson 1hr = $2
Total = $408

Monday, September 12, 2011

Weekend in Anaheim

The Good

We ended with a win, barely, but a win nonetheless. Granderson hit his 39th homerun, and Montero also added a jack over the weekend. Sabathia had a rough time, but ended with 6 innings and 1 run. Colon pitched one of his best games of the season with 7 innings of 1 run ball, and that one run was unearned.

The Bad

Despite the pitching performances of Sabathia and Colon, the Yankee offense could not remember how a bat worked. They pulled out the instructions that came in the bat box, but they were written in Chinese. After trying to decipher the text for the first couple days, they realized that the instructions were not written in Chinese, but were simply upside down. The instructions were simple: "Swing bat and connect with ball". The Yankees tried this approach last night and came out with a win.

The Ugly

It seemed like in a manner of moments, we saw every catcher in the Yankees organization. Cervelli had concussion like symptoms, and took to the DL, then Martin hurt his thumb, and was day-to-day, leaving Posada to catch on Saturday. Sunday it was Montero, followed by Romine, who had just taken a taxi from Scranton to Anaheim, stopping only to help damsel's in distress as is his character.

Yankee Bats Go Quiet, but the Children Still Are Provided For

Despite the generally lackluster hitting over the weekend, Montero and Granderson made sure the children would not suffer with solo homeruns. That's $4 for the Children's Health Fund.

Mark Teixeira 36hr = $72
Curtis Granderson 39hr = $78
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 15hr = $30
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 24hr = $48
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 22hr = $44
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Jesus Montero 3hr = $6
Total = $404

Friday, September 9, 2011

What's With the Back to Back Extra Innings Losses?

The Good

The Yankees scored 4 runs in the first three innings. They then went on cruise control and fell asleep at the wheel. What they didn't realize is that cruise control doesn't actually drive your car. So the Yankees crashed in the 10th.

The Bad

I guess the bad was partially mixed in with the good, but I will add to that 5.1 innings of 3 run ball from Nova. I don't know whey we're having such a hard time with the Orioles but we are.

The Ugly

The bullpen turning this one over. Logan gave up an RBI double, Laffey walked the only guy he faced, and both Soriano and Proctor gave up a run, Proctor's being a walk off. So the bullpen wasn't great, but our offense falling silent over the last 7 innings of this game didn't help either.

Nope

No homeruns = No donations. Its that simple Yankees.

Mark Teixeira 36hr = $72
Curtis Granderson 38hr = $76
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 15hr = $30
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 24hr = $48
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 22hr = $44
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Jesus Montero 2hr = $4
Total = $400

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Triple A Team No Match for Orioles

The Good

I'm sure there was something, but with all this rain I'm feeling like a cup is half empty kind of guy right now. But if I'm really pressed I'd have to say that Montero hit a two-run double, as he continues to show that he's a legitimate big league hitter, and both Robertson and Soriano had scoreless innings in relief where Robertson struck out all three hitters he faced.

The Bad

We lost. In the 11th. At that point we had the majority of our big league lineup in the game, and we still couldn't manage a timely hit. AJ Burnett didn't help much with his 6 innings of 4 run ball. He wasn't terrible, but this is the Orioles we're talking about. If there's any game to lock down a win, its this one.

The Ugly

The game played more like a bloopers reel rather than a baseball game. The Yankees had 4 errors charged against them, while there were several other misplays that didn't get called errors, but still looked like they were the opposing team in a Harlem Globetrotters show.

The Babies Don't Help the Babies

The lineup boasted such minor league callups as Brandon Laird, Eduardo Nunez, Greg Golson, and Jesus Montero, but despite being closer in age to the babies at the Children's Health Fund, they did little to help their cause. No homeruns means no cash for the babies.

Mark Teixeira 36hr = $72
Curtis Granderson 38hr = $76
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 15hr = $30
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 24hr = $48
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 22hr = $44
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Jesus Montero 2hr = $4
Total = $400

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

That Took Forever

The Good

Hughes went 6 innings allowing 2 runs giving the Yankee offense a chance to get into it, which they did with homeruns from Posada, Cervelli and Gardner. When it comes down to it, the Yankees have been swinging the bats very well of late. Mariano locked his 39th save of the season putting him within 3 saves of tieing Trevor Hoffman's career record.

The Bad

The game started at 11:00pm and ended around 2:15am. This was problematic because those are also the hours that Curtis Granderson fights crime. Distracted by all the calls for help, Granderson went 0-3 with 3 strikeouts.

The Ugly

Posada got in the game and went 1-3 with a homerun. The truth is, the Yankees have mishandled Posada all season. They dropped him to number 9 in the lineup on a nationally televised game against the Red Sox, then they removed him from the lineup altogether on another nationally televised game against the Red Sox. Then they got mad at Jeter for not jumping on Posada. Posada isn't done. And the Yankees showed a lot more patience with Jeter at the plate than they have with Posada, and that's with Jeter batting leadoff as opposed to number 6, 7, 8 or 9 like Posada has. It almost feels like there's something personal between Posada and the Yankee brass, and that right there is ugly.

Homeruns from the Peanut Gallery and their Chaperone.

Posada, Gardner and Cervelli all hit solo homeruns accounting for an additional $6 going to the Children's Health Fund. Granderson's bat has been pretty quiet, but he tends to go through streaks, and there's no better time like to present to start a streak.

Mark Teixeira 36hr = $72
Curtis Granderson 38hr = $76
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 15hr = $30
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 24hr = $48
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 22hr = $44
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Jesus Montero 2hr = $4
Total = $394

PS. The Yankees are at 200 homeruns on the season. Last year they him 201 all season. Let's see how close they get to the 244 they hit in 2009. Ah, what a good year for the Children's Health Fund.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Yankees Win...Barely

The Good

The Yankees scored 11 runs! Much respect to Jesus Montero, the baby-faced baby DH in the lineup who hit 2 homeruns and drew a walk, and of course Robinson Cano, who hit a grandslam. Pitching was pretty awful, but I admit it was nice seeing Scott Proctor again. I thought his cyborg arm looked decent yesterday.

The Bad

Mariano came very close to blowing the save. Close enough to make me sweat, and I don't like sweating as it makes me want to shower thus using up the planets most essential natural resource: water. So if Mariano doesn't want to be responsible for the decreasing water supply he needs to lock these saves down! On a side note, Mo is just 4 saves of tieing and 5 saves of passing Trevor Hoffman on the all-times saves list.

The Ugly

Freddy Garcia's start. The final line included 7 runs in 2.2 innings. That's the problem with pitchers who rely on deception. Sometimes, they're hung over.

Bats for Babies

The Yankees went to bat for the babies and came up with 4 homeruns, 2 from Monters, and 1 each from Cano and Teixeira. That's $8 for the babies at the Children's Health Fund.

Mark Teixeira 36hr = $72
Curtis Granderson 38hr = $76
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 15hr = $30
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 24hr = $48
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 22hr = $44
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Jesus Montero 2hr = $4
Total = $394

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Yanks Go for Sweep, Decide to Bludgeon Opponent with Broom Handle Instead

The Good

19 wins for Sabathia. Bautista was held to only one home run while the Yankees managed three (one each for Jeter, A-Rod, and Swish). The Yankees also scored nine runs as a team. Because you win as a team.

The Bad

Somebody, somewhere in the stands went to get concessions and brought his girlfriend the wrong thing. He felt really bad about it.

The Ugly

When Bautista hit his Major League leading 40th home run, Granderson vowed revenge. Someone pointed out to him that he could just hit 2 more home runs, but he chose revenge anyway.

Hacks for Stacks (of Cash)

Three home runs today means $6 more for the kids. Yay!

Mark Teixeira 35hr = $70
Curtis Granderson 38hr = $76
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 15hr = $30
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 23hr = $46
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 22hr = $44
Derek Jeter 5hr = $10
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Total = $386

P.S.

That's right, I said 'Yay'. What are you going to do about it?!

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Yanks Take First Two From Jays

The Good

Nova gave us another strong outing, earning his 15th win of the season. While Colon's outing was not as strong, he kept us in the game and the Yanks offense came through. The bullpen has not allowed any runs in the last two games, a major league record.

The Bad

Falsifying statistics is bad, and I'm pretty sure I just did that. I could apologize for doing so and move on, but instead I'm going to deny it before Congress, helping them waste taxpayer dollars on pointless hearings. Then I'm going to make the federal government try me on criminal charges in federal court, thus wasting more taxpayer dollars. Then I'm going to make them house and feed me for however long my sentence is, wasting additional taxpayer dollars. That's how I roll.

The Ugly

We've won three in a row, let's try to keep things positive.

Allowance

Gardner and Cervelli each had one home run. Gardner hit his yesterday, so it doesn't matter anymore. Cervelli, on the other hand, hit his today, so he's a hero. $4 more for the kids.

Mark Teixeira 35hr = $70
Curtis Granderson 38hr = $76
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 14hr = $28
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 23hr = $46
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 6hr = $12
Nick Swisher 21hr = $42
Derek Jeter 4hr = $8
Francisco Cervelli 3hr = $6
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Total = $380

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Yanks Take Series

The Good

Burnett gave us 5.1 innings of two-run ball. Then every member of the bullpen came into the game to close it out. Nick Swisher continued his wacky bunting antics, which always pleases the crowd. Russell Martin's two-run double was the difference in the game.

The Bad

This game was way too close. Lester threw something like 100 pitches in the first inning, all to Nick Swisher, and the Yanks still only mustered 1 run against him. That's bad.

The Ugly

Al Leiter trying to find a silver lining in the work AJ has done with Larry Rothschild. Let's face it, AJ is a very consistent pitcher in the month of April, then he's a train wreck. But not a regular train wreck. A train wreck that happens right in front of a nuclear reactor but doesn't damage the reactor. Then, suddenly, oh no! A plane is headed right for us! The plane smashes into the train, but doesn't harm the reactor. We're all saved. Then another plane smashes into the reactor and we're all dead. The end.

Two in a Row?

Normally, the Yankees score all their runs on home runs. They've scored exactly zero runs on home runs in the last two games. I'm not sure what to make of this, so I made a paper mache hat. It's awesome!

Mark Teixeira 35hr = $70
Curtis Granderson 38hr = $76
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 14hr = $28
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 23hr = $46
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 5hr = $10
Nick Swisher 21hr = $42
Derek Jeter 4hr = $8
Francisco Cervelli 2hr = $4
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Total = $376

At Least the Rotation Pictures Coming Into Focus

The Good

We scored 5 runs off Becket (4 earned). Jeter got a couple hits driving in a run in the process. No Bothan spies died during the game.

The Bad

Despite the 5 runs, the Yankee offense never really got going. We had 6 hits all game, and no homeruns. Not even one from Granderson who has lost his tie for league lead with Bautista's 2-run shot yesterday.

The Ugly

A typical big league rotation has a staff ace, a solid 2, a scrappy 3, a rebounding or declining 4, and a really old or really young 5. The Yankees rotation has a staff ace, and then a cast of number 3's and 4's. This is good for the regular season, but horrifying for our post season hopes. We currently don't have a stopper, or even a big game pitcher with big game stuff past Sabathia. Garcia is a big game pitcher, but his game has been reduced to deception, guile, malicious winks, and confusing riddles. Hughes did little to help this rotation question with his 5.2 innings of 6 run ball. If the post season started today, you'd probably be seeing Sabathia, Colon, Garcia and Nova. And that's not fair because Sabathia doesn't speak spanish, and will feel left out of the post season rotation banter. The good news is that we still have a month of baseball, and if any one of our 6 starters get hot, it can help solve our post season rotation question. The bad news is that we still have a month of baseball, and any one of our 6 starters could really pitch like crap.

Yankees Say No to Babies

No homeruns means not a single dollar is donated to help babies get better. The Yankees better make up for that today. My prediction? Homeruns from Swisher, Teixeira, Granderson, and lets say Jeter. With Burnett on the mound we'll need every single one we can get.

Mark Teixeira 35hr = $70
Curtis Granderson 38hr = $76
Russell Martin 17hr = $34
Alex Rodriguez 14hr = $28
Jorge Posada 12hr = $24
Robinson Cano 23hr = $46
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Brett Gardner 5hr = $10
Nick Swisher 21hr = $42
Derek Jeter 4hr = $8
Francisco Cervelli 2hr = $4
Eduardo Nunez 4hr = $8
Ramiro Pena 1hr = $2
Eric Chavez 1hr = $2
Total = $376