It's not looking good folks. At least we have CC on the mound today, but it's not looking great. We can't hit. We can't pitch consistently unless we're named Andy Pettitte (Pettitte...I rarely even know it?). We can't even try to bunt a few guys on to get a base runner on for Cano (who's ridiculous right now).
What can the Yankees do? I'm sure they've already filled out a blank check to present to Cliff Lee after the World Series is over.
They could call Bud Selig and apologize that the ratings for a Texas-San Fran World Series are going to be so awful. The series itself might be good, but it's kind of a tree falling in the woods situation. Nobody's there to give a $#!%. I'm pretty sure that's how it goes.
It's been a long season, but I would do some sit-ups if I was a Yankee right about now. You'll be on a beach soon and you'll want to look good.
I know, I know. I shouldn't just give up on the season. We're still in this thing. But this team hasn't exactly shown a lot of resilience as of late, so I'm prepared to let my mind drift to what trades and free agent signings we should make. Granted, if they move on to the next round, I'll be all Randy Quaid in Major Leagues, acting like I knew they would make it all along. The nice thing about having a comedy blog is that if someone says to you, "you literally wrote they should start in on their vacation plans," I just say, "It's irony a@$$hole."