Friday, February 28, 2014

Pavano Attempts to Upstage Jeter

Coming on the heels of the Derek Jeter retirement announcement that so shook the baseball world, Carl Pavano has announced his own retirement from the game in a thinly veiled attempt to steal the spotlight from Jeter.

Pavano cites an injury to his spleen, and the inability to fully recover from it, as part of the reason he has decided to retire. The spleen, an internal organ, is viewed by many as more sentimental than an ankle, even though the spleen is not actually a necessary organ.

Pavano's retirement begins effective immediately, which can hardly be anything other than a desperate cry for attention.

Well congratulations, Carl. We're all looking at you now. Does this make you happy? Huh? Does it?!

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