Sunday, July 8, 2012

Yanks Finish First Half with Series Win and Baseball's Best Record

The Good

Ivan Nova became the Yankees' first 10 game winner, throwing 6 innings and allowing 2 runs, 1 earned. Andruw Jones continued to punish Boston for simply existing, hitting his fourth home run in 3 games. The Yanks own the best record in baseball heading into the All-Star break.

The Bad

Now that scientists have largely confirmed the existence of the Higgs Boson, we at RJG have given up the search for a new theory to replace the Standard Model. We can now return to blogging on a regular basis. Since we last posted, the Yankees have hit 10 more home runs. This isn't bad, but I've got more updating than I feel like doing.

The Ugly

Many Yankees are looking forward to the upcoming All-Star break and its attendant festivities. Robinson Cano, in particular, is excited to be heading up the AL's Home Run Derby team. However, when asked about it after last night's game, Cano seemed interested only in speaking about something he's less excited about, the upcoming Summer Olympics in London.

"Don't get me wrong," Cano pleaded, "it's not that I hate the Olympics, I just don't get it. I mean, what's the point? Like, if there wasn't track and field and somebody was all, 'hey, check out how fast I can run', we'd all be like, 'wow! What a useless skill! Why don't you go quickly run yourself over to the nearest fast food restaurant, get a job, and start contributing something non-pointless to society.' I mean, am I wrong?"

He wasn't wrong. He was brave for finally saying what we were all thinking, but lacked the courage to put into articulated speech.

The Overdue Math

We already know Jones has hit 4 home runs in the last 3 games. Since our last game review, Wise, Swisher, Nix, and Chavez have each hit one home run, while Teixeira has hit two. That's $20 more for the kids.

Raul Ibanez 11hr = $22
Nick Swisher 13hr = $26
Andruw Jones 11hr = $22
Derek Jeter 7hr = $14
Curtis Granderson 23hr = $46
Alex Rodriguez 13hr = $26
Robinson Cano 20hr = $40
Mark Teixeira 15hr = $30
Eric Chavez 7hr = $14
Russell Martin 8hr = $16
Jayson Nix 3hr = $6
Dewayne Wise 3hr = $6

Total 134hr = $268


Rich Mahogany said...

This is much better than the Sherman Method!

Anonymous said...

I agree.

Roberto E. Alejandro said...

There's a chance Joel Sherman might be suing you both now, but I'm barred from further comment by a court order.