Andy Pettitte almost retired yesterday as it was reported that Cashman said he would not pitch in 2011. That was later recinded as Pettitte basically said he wouldn't start the season as a pitcher, but may still decide to pitch mid-season ala Roger Clemens last 3 years.
"I just can't make a decision." Explained Pettitte. "Yesterday, I was in my chair and my dog walked over to me, and I was looking in his face, and I thought to myself 'Look at this cute puppy, I need to retire.' But then as I kept staring at it I was like 'Can I really look at this puppy for 6 straight months? (expletive deleted) that!'"
The puppy, a beagle, was not available for comment, but a neighbor of Pettitte did say something revealing.
"Most years around this time, I see Pettitte working out, preparing for the season. This year, he's still working out, but its like power walks and crap like that. Its how you work out when you retire."