Choo Takes Less Money to Stay Off Sinking Ship

Outfielder Shin-Soo Choo has agreed to a 7 year, $130 million contract with the Texas Rangers. This represents $10 million less than the deal he turned down from the Yankees about a month ago, when he decided he didn't want to spend his late thirties on a team with no pitching on the 25 man roster or the minor leagues.

Additionally, with no Texas state income tax, Choo will pocket slightly more than he would have had he accepted the deal in New York, guaranteeing that he will actually be able to afford a home in New York City—should he inexplicably decide to live there—something that New York's offer could not guarantee.

"I like New York and would love to be able to live in Manhattan," explained Choo. "But if you're not the head of a large bank or brokerage you basically have to live in Jersey, or Westchester. I was not moving to @#$*ing Westchester."

Choo's agent, Scott Boras, explained the economics in these terms, "Basically, the Yankees would have to have offered $1.3 billion in order to match the housing buying power Choo will enjoy in Arlington Texas. That was our counteroffer, but the Yankees were worried about guaranteeing that much money to a player on this side of forty. Maybe in seven years."