Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Spring Training is Boring

Andy Pettitte threw a bullpen yesterday. You probably already know that because it's practically headline news this time of year. The only time an Andy Pettitte bullpen should be headline news is if the story goes something like this:

Andy Pettitte Throws Bullpen, Martin $#!%$ Himself

(AP) - Today, Andy Pettitte threw his first bullpen of the spring, beginning a process that he hopes will help him return to the dominant form he last displayed in 2010. Russell Martin, catching the legendary Yankee hurler for the first time, $#!% himself.

"When you crouch down in that box, and you see those eyes glaring at you from behind that glove . . . it's creepy man," explained a still soiled Martin. "I was scared, so I $#!% myself."

The actual story, that Martin was impressed by Pettitte's location, is boring. At this point, everything about this spring is boring. There aren't even enough roster spots open to competition to pretend to have anything to care about. The rotation questions aren't interesting because, unless somebody gets hurt, the Yankees are going to put Garcia in the bullpen since he missed 'significant time' with that hand injury and isn't as 'stretched out' as everybody else. You know, the players that were going to get rotation spots ahead of Garcia no matter what. I just want it to be April 6th, so we can start to care again.

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