It had been a few weeks since we last spoke to everyone's favorite GM, Brian Cashman via satellite video phone. Since there is still a large, looming, ominous, question mark in left field, we thought it was time to call him up and hit him with our particular brand of RJG magic. The following is a transcript of what transpired:
BC: Hello?
RJG: Good morning, Bronny. How are you today?
BC: Fine until you called. Now I'd say that I'm mostly depressed.
RJG: Is that the Tetris theme I hear?
BC: No, I'm listening to the radio.
RJG: That's not the radio man, that's Tetris. I've played Tetris before, I know what the theme song sounds like, and I can see you playing Tetris on the satellite video phone. Right there, you just made a bad move.
BC: No, it's the New York Philharmonic covering the video game classics. I assure you I'm not playing Tetris.
RJG: What are you going to do about left field?
BC: Probably Gardner or something . . .
RJG: Will you pay attention?! Gardner wasn't good enough to be your regular center fielder, how is he going to be your starting left fielder when that is generally a much more offensive position than center?
BC: Well, we get above average production from center so left doesn't need a big block.
RJG: What?
BC: What?
RJG: You just said you don't need a big block in left.
BC: That doesn't sound like something I would say. Maybe you're hearing things.
RJG: How about revisiting Damon? I heard he's thinking about retiring. Why couldn't you do an incentive laden contract like you did with Pettitte last year in order to stay within your "budget."
BC: Yeah, we have a budget.
RJG: You're not listening to me are you.
BC: Uh-huh.
RJG: Bronny!
BC: What?!
RJG: What about Damon!
BC: I can't talk about other team's players.
RJG: He's a free agent!
BC: Nothing in life is free.
RJG: It's not all about you Bronny.
BC: Uh-huh.
RJG: I said, It's not all about you, Bronny!
BC: Oh, sorry.
[Click]
There you have it folks. Brian Cashman remains hard at work searching for a better left field option.
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11 comments:
There's only one person who can snap Bronny out of this Tetris phase and get him back to doing his job. We need to enlist Madonna's help. But how...?
I don't think Madonna wants to talk to him, which probably just drives him deeper into Tetris.
I love this and all conversations with Bronny, but...
"RJG: Will you pay attention?! Gardner wasn't good enough to be your regular center fielder, how is he going to be your starting left fielder when that is generally a much more offensive position than center?"
Most teams don't get awesome offensive production out of their shortstop, catcher, and 2B (and who's the best 3B in the AL? Unless there's someone incredibly obvious I'm forgetting, only the beastly Longoria is in Alex's stratosphere.). We do.
Well, first off, you're forgetting that Adrian Beltre is the best player in baseball and he puts the Red Sox over the top because Theo wouldn't sign anyone that didn't make the Red Sox the best team ever.
I do realize we're offensively superior to most, if not all other teams, but most teams don't play in the AL East and compete with the Rays and BoSox. I know we don't have to have a great bat in left b/c we get superior production at other positions, but I'd still prefer to have someone who will reliably do the job. Gardner may prove to be that, but he's not that yet. Remember that we're probably going to see a lot of the back up catcher this season, both because AJ won't pitch to Posada and because Posada tears his hamstring every April. So what happens when you've got Cervelli and Gardner back to back for a significant amount of time? Not trying to be greedy, but would like some insurance in the line-up in instances where other key guys may be hurt or slumping.
Remember when Matsui was slumping in the beginning of last season, and it would be him, followed by Molina and Gardner? It was awful to watch.
Crap, and I was just going to come back and say something like:
"Actually, Beltre is the best 3B in the AL and in the conversation with Mike Schmidt as the best 3B of all time. /Gammons'ed"
You have a point about the backups, but unfortunately enough, the bench seems to get ignored every off-season.
One thing I do have faith in is that AJ will just suck it up and pitch to Posada. He had many crappy games with Posada but he also had some excellent games with him. Same with Molina. But people seem to ignore the verrrrry good games he pitched with Posada behind the plate (like his 7.2 IP, 0 ER performance against the Sox in the 15-inning game), and the totally awful games he pitched with Molina behind the plate (like Game 5 of the WS). AJ is just kind of crazy and is either going to pitch a near no-hitter or walk ten guys and give up 32 home runs.
Oh shit you guys are funny. The Bronny interviews are fantastic...you should win an award for best comedy yankee blog for sure...
Also, really, Gardner should be in CF and Grandy in LF. He's a very very good defender, even better than Granderson, who's also very good. If you're gonna carry Gardner in your lineup, you might as well put him in the place where you can get the most value out of him.
Really what this proves is we should have signed Beltran in 2005. >:( (Yes, even with his knee issues. When the Yankees had all those pulled hamstrings a few years ago, they actually - gasp! - fired the bad medical crew and got new guys).
Whoah, the word verification is "jeetrs".
Backup catchers are almost always terrible. If a catcher is even slightly decent as a hitter, he will start somewhere and make a lot of money for it. Pudge is getting $6 million and might turn to dust at any moment. Cervelli is fine - Molina was a black hole in the lineup anyway.
Now is not the time to focus on the bench. Bronny has shown that he can acquire very good bench players during the season for low-level prospects (see the Hinske, Hairston, and Molina trades). This is a better move than overpaying for these players when they are free agents, like the Braves and Padres arguably did for Hinske and Hairston now.
Gardner has the potential to play like a player making 20 times his salary because of his speed and defense. He should get a shot. I'm sure that if he sucks, Bronny will show no mercy.
Thanks, Yankee Magic. We really appreciate it!
I hope you're right about AJ sucking it up, Anonymous. You're right that people forget he had some great games with Posada and some bad ones with Molina. Though some guys, like AJ, can be head cases, and I suspect he had it in his mind that he would pitch better to Molina which is why Girardi let him have his personal catcher.
I think Gardner probably would be better in center than in left (at least it gives us the better defensive boost), but if they wanted to do that they needed to communicate that to Granderson sooner. I think now there is the risk for hard feelings.
I'm not sold on Gardner, but if he gets a shot and plays well, it'll be great for the Yanks. If not, this will happen.
Maybe we should just call up Hits 4 Average to play LF.
Haha, that takes it back. Catch N Throw and Hits 4 Average are fighting to get on the big league roster.
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