Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Joba Wins Competition for Eight Inning Role

Joba has been declared the new eighth inning set-up man for the Yankees. This settles the last question surrounding the Yankees' bullpen. Joba was relieved to hear that he finally had a concrete role with the team.

"Before I was just a relief pitcher," said Joba in the visiting clubhouse at the Oakland Coliseum, surrounded by reporters. "That's so nebulous. It means nothing. Now I'm a relief pitcher who pitches in the eighth, or when the team otherwise needs me. Finally I have some stability. Some structure."

Joba earned a hard-fought victory for eighth spot. Competitors in the 'pen included Joba Chamberlain and one Chamberlain, Joba.

"We weren't sure who we were going to go with," explained Girardi. "Joba was always right there, but so were Marte and Robertson. That's why we tested all those guys in the eighth inning of close games to see who would come out on top."

Girardi then added, "Just kidding, it was always Joba."


Roberto E. Alejandro said...

Good, fundamental baseball.

Rich Mahogany said...

Girardi continued: "Nebulous. I love that word. It means hard to define."

Only on the Yankees could "8th Inning Guy" be an honorific title, because you're the one who gets to hand the ball over to Rivera. On any other team you would just be the second best reliever.

JeterIsGod said...

Unfortunately for Joba the Hut, and Mr. Lova Man...Joba, they wont get a chance to pitch in the 8th.

Rich Mahogany said...

Don't forget about Joe-ba Chamberlain and Fistpump Controversy Chamberlain, two more casualties of the 8th inning wars. Although rumor is that Fistpump Controversy Chamberlain might end up stealing Kyle Farnsworth's role in the Royals' pen. Unfortunately, Kyle Farnsworth's role is currently janitor.

Roberto E. Alejandro said...

"Kyle Farnsworth's role is currently janitor." Classic.