Friday, August 20, 2010

An Open Letter of Apology to Phil Hughes

Dear Mr. Hughes,

Yesterday we at the RJG incorrectly reported that you pitched five innings, when indeed you had pitched six innings. It's not that I was purposely trying to misrepresent your accomplishment, it's just that I misread the box score. Had someone in the Yankees front office alerted me about yesterday's series finale being a day game, maybe this wouldn't have happened. Or maybe, just maybe, if you were man enough to sit through a long half inning and still be able to pitch this never would have happened. Then you might have thrown seven innings, and it is much harder to confuse seven with five than it is six with five, being as the latter two symbols are more similar in the Arabic number system. I guess we can both agree that it's a good thing the Offense didn't give you a nine run lead in the second, in which case you would've had a very short day and I would've been writing about Mitre instead. So do accept my sincerest apologies for our mistake.




cheshirecat9 said...

If they had pulled Hughes in the 2nd and put in Mitre, we would have lost even with a 9 run lead. Good thing the offense waited until the 6th.

Rich Mahogany said...

I was fine with this until you referred to the Arabic number system, which is disrespectful considering that Hughes pitches for the NEW YORK Yankees. I'm not saying you don't have the right to use the Arabic number system, I'm just saying you should have thought about the wisdom of using it in this letter of apology. I hope for your sake that Hughes is more forgiving than I am.

Roberto E. Alejandro said...

I'm afraid all western nations use the arabic number system, xenophobia not withstanding.

Rich Mahogany said...

You may be right that all western nations use the Arabic number system, but should we? Wouldn't it be more American to say that Hughes pitched VI innings of II run ball in a XI-V game? I'm ordering my toga right now.

Roberto E. Alejandro said...

Maybe we should just call it the Freedom Number System