Thursday, August 5, 2010

A-Rod Hits 600, Now Life Returns to Normal

The Good

The monkey is officially off A-Rod's back, as he hit his 600th career homerun in yesterdays game. It was just a matter of time, but that time was starting to get long and tedious. And then I realized that A-Rod was doing baseball a favor. By delaying his milestone, he ensured packed stadiums across the country. In fact, it was selfish of him to hit it this early. He should have waited until September at least. Bud Selig must be pissed.

Phil Hughes pitched 5.1 innings only allowing 1 run, and Derek Jeter, remembering that he's in a contract year, went 4-4 with 2 doubles. Mariano, also in a walk year, has a 0.91 ERA.

The Bad

Fat Elvis is an inaccurate nickname for Lance Berkman. Elvis was a better hitter.

The Ugly

I'm watching Saturday's Yankees vs. Red Sox game in a bar in Boston. Should be an experience.

A-Rod Loves the Babies Too

Overwhelmed by the daunting task of reaching his milestone, A-Rod was buckling. But yesterday, he saw the little babies and he remembered that for every homerun he hits, the RJG donates $2 to the Children's Health Fund. Filled with a renewed sense of ambition, A-Rod hit his milestone homerun and allowed money to be given to the babies. We applaud his bravery.

Posada 12hr = $24
Granderson 10hr = $20
Cano 21hr = $42
Swisher 22hr = $44
Jeter 9hr = $18
Johnson 2hr = $4
Rodriguez 17hr = $34
Teixeira 23hr = $46
Thames 3hr = $6
Gardner 5hr = $10
Winn 1hr = $2
Miranda 3hr = $6
Curtis 1hr = $1
Total = $258


Rich Mahogany said...

Someone should look into the fascination that monkeys have with ARod's back.

Fernando Alejandro said...

Hahaha, its so true. He's been fighting off the monkey horde his entire career.

Anonymous said...

Oh, he did it! That should be enough.

lady gaganonymous said...

I'm really surprised that Mariano Rivera's season isn't getting that much attention. It's pretty crazy. I suppose it's a mix of a lot of things... YEAR OF TEH PITCHER!!!!, his lack of saves compared to someone like say Heath Bell, and the fact that he's, well, Mariano Rivera.

I'm extremely amused by the fact that there have been about 51018956 articles telling us how no one cares about A-Rod's 600th HR.

Fernando Alejandro said...

In fairness, I don't care about A-Rod's 600th homerun either.