Friday, February 13, 2009

Derek Jeter Releases Statement About A-Rod to Respect Jeter's Gangster

Everyone's been waiting for Derek Jeter to address the media about the A-Rod situation, and he still plans to do so. However, Jeter wanted to do an advanced release about the A-Rod situation exclusively through the Respect Jeter' Gangster website. Here is his statement:

"I, Derek Jeter, would like everyone to know that A-Rod is my teammate. Thank you."

There you have it, Derek Jeter is A-Rod's teammate. Jeter also wanted to release a statement about his excitement for this upcoming season. Here it is:

"I'm very excited for this upcoming season."

So that will have to hold you over until he actually addresses the press in the near future.

18 comments:

anonymous number two said...

That was spot on!

Roberto Alejandro said...

I bet you his later statement is exactly that. we just scooped everyone in the press. Booyashaka!

TribeGirl said...

I love Jeter and all, but I could care less what he has to say. Why you ask? Because it won't be how he truly feels, it will be some crafted PC statement, and for that I could care less. Everyone wanted ARod to be honest, and I for one feel he was. Jeter should be honest too, or just stick with "No Comment." Since his honesty would probably eff with the whole team morale, stick with "No Comment" because I don't want to hear some fake shizzle that always seems to come out of his mouth.

RSiciliano said...

TribeGirl, how do you really feel?

Fernando Alejandro said...

Jeter is a master at using words to say nothing. I think its a necessary skill for him. There would be a whole lot of distractions for him if he said everything he was really thinking, and that goes for all public personas.

Roberto Alejandro said...

We may have to do a post on what Jeter is really thinking. I think it would be great if he answered all questions with random factoids. "Hey Jeter, How do you feel about A-Rod?" "Did you know a cow has four stomachs?"

She-Fan said...

You nailed Jeter's response, except that he'd probably add: "We just need to win games."

Ed The Sports Fan said...

Just for the record, just in case anyone forgot. I still hate the got damn Yankees.

Thank you.

-Ed.
www.edthesportsfan.com

Fernando Alejandro said...

As a Braves fan from the late nineties, you have full reason to dislike the Yankees. From the Yankees perspective however, the Braves were just the last team we saw before winning a world series. So, we hold no hatred towards your team. Cheers!

Ruthie said...

lol!! exactly how i envisioned it! you guys forgot the part about him saving the cats, but more or less thats all that will be said.. how funny would it be if he throws us all for a loop and just lets everyone have it .."you know what, i didnt like a-rod from the begining...he tried to hard, and in the showers..i could swear i saw his eye go "below the belt"".. is it so hard to say what you realy feel jeter???!!! but you gotta love him! only he can make nothing sound so appeling!

Anonymous said...

How much did you have to spend to get him drunk and talky?
Joe

anonymous number two said...

I am probably getting ahead of myself, but if Girardi can't 'manage' this AROD mess and gets fired, who might be available to be hired? I suppose Jeter could be a player-manager. Maybe not.

Roberto Alejandro said...

I'd probably manage the team, at least until Piniella leaves the cubbies.

L to the B said...

Ha. You totally nailed a "Jeter response".

Oh, if Girardi is fired mid-season..Hank will take over. At least that's what happens in my nightmares.

anonymous number two said...

So what Roberto and L to the B are telling me is that the Yankees are basically screwed? Except for the Sweet Lou part.

Fernando Alejandro said...

If Girardi is fired mid-season options include Willie Randolph and Tony Pena. If they wait until after the season then Bobby Valentine becomes an option. I wouldn't sleep on Pena. He managed the Royals to their only winning season since the '94 players strike. In fairness, he also managed them to two of their worst seasons since the '94 players strike. Either way, he has managing experience.

Fernando Alejandro said...

I should also add about Pena that in his losing seasons he had really really really bad teams. The lowest ERA of any of his starters was 4.79. All the other starters had ERA's in the 5 and 6 range. His top offensive performer was Mike Sweeney with 21 homeruns, and was the only .300 hitter on the entire team. The team had a .268 batting average and a .320 OBP.

Joe, I know, he really opened up. I was surprised to see it, but I'm not complaining. Maybe Minka Kelly has him in good spirits.

Anonymous said...

Minka is VG for "good spirits" isn't it?

Wel,, #2, this is how it's gonna be.
The week before the AllStar break, with the Yanks 10 games below .500, despite ARod humbly hitting .450 with 40 homers, and Joe so frazzled his har is growing out, a huge BOOM! resounds through the new Stadium.
Everybody looks to the sky, where what do they see, but George Himself, after massive doses of completely legal and ethically prescribed HGH and enough stem cells to repopulate Tombstone Arizona.
He leaps from his God Box down to the dugout roof, does some King Kong poses and cries out in a voice that cracks some of the substandard work that was never supposed to get caught "I SHOULD HAVE DONE THIS 30 YEARS AGO!"
Then he sticks his Bluetooth earpiece, into which he's downloaded the brain of Casey Stengal, in his ear, rips off his suit jacket to expose his #1 tribute jersy, and takes his place atthe end of the bench.
The Yankees go undefeated the rest of the season, winning the division by 30 games and sweeping the playoffs and WS, no matter that anybody making more than minimum wage spends at least one tour on the DL, and nobody has any f*****g idea what he says for the rest of the year.

Joe