Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Derek Jeter Used Gangster to Improve Performance

So much attention has been given to performance enhancers like steroids and HGH that very little attention has been given to performance enhancers such as gangster. If anything, gangster is what drives most players to use PED's. When you're waiting in line for the batting cage, and the player batting in the cage is really gangster, aren't you more likely to be jealous of them? And since gangster does not come in an injectable or tablet form, won't it drive you to use banned substances to compensate? Basically put, the most gangster player in the game, Derek Jeter, is the reason PED's became as prominent as they did. Jeter would run into the stands head first, and play way out of position to flip throw runners out at home, and do such awesome things that everyone in the league was forced to compete on his level. Since his level was far out of reach for them, they turned to substances they didn't fully understand. Until gangster comes in a needle, players will always be tempted to use something to compete with Derek Jeter. Unfortunately, all they'll do is hit homeruns and feel inadequate.

4 comments:

TribeGirl said...

"Unfortunately, all they'll do is hit homeruns and feel inadequate." OH SNAP! Well, that hit below the belt. I don't have a comeback for ARod on that one. I'm not ready...

Broken Arrow said...

Is there a PED out there that will let me get one or two patented "Gangster Jeet Shark Slaps" in before I'm bitten?

Roberto Alejandro said...

just go for the nose, they hate that.

Raven King said...

Just stop swimming where sharks are known to have their meals.
Go get one of these, that is.