Friday, June 5, 2009

Yanks Rained Out

The Good

No one had to deal with self-important security guards at Yankee Stadium, since the game was called nice and early. Further, the Yankees made use of the National Weather Service. Someone has to. We at RJG prefer to divine the weather through games of dice. It works for us.

The Bad

We at RJG had little to do once the game was called. The Yankees clearly have no regard for their devoted bloggers. Boredom set in quickly once the game was called. We spent most of the day playing beer pong, only more beer and less pong. That was our morning. By the time lunch rolled around we were in no shape to watch a ballgame, let alone review one. We thank the Yankees for cancelling today's game at our behest.

The Ugly

Notice how 'The Bad' didn't make any sense? First we criticize the Yankees for calling the game, later we thank them for it and take credit for the cancellation. Okay, partial credit. But still. Not only that, the entire chronology is all sorts of messed up. First we're playing beer pong after the cancellation, then it's morning all of a sudden. That makes no sense. Thanks a lot Yankees.

The Charitable Giving

No Yankees hit any home runs today. Deadbeats.

Jorge Posada 8hr = $8.00
Hideki Matsui 8hr = $8.00
Derek Jeter 7hr = $7.00
Mark Teixeira 16hr = $16.00
Nick Swisher 10hr = $10.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 11hr = $11.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 7hr = $7.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $85.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

5 comments:

Raven King said...

Carl the Ace pitched a three-hit shutout!!!!!!
Why the hell didn't we resign him?

Roberto E. Alejandro said...

Pavano is different in Cleveland. There, he pitches like an ace. Here, he prefers the comforts of the bench and/or Tampa.

She-Fan said...

Anyone going to the 6/17 game against the Nats? If so, come and say hello!

Raven King said...

When I look at the curious cases of Carl the Ace and Chien-ming Wang, I can't help wondering if the Yankees have been mishandling their injured pitchers.
Wang's struggle is the result of their screwing up his rehab.
So maybe Pavano is not the only one to blame for his reputation as "the American Idle".

Fernando Alejandro said...

I would love to go to that game! Unfortunately I wouldn't be able to swing the work time.