Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Yanks Take First Game From Mariners

The Good

The Yankees offense stayed hot, in the late inning anyway, good for a 5-8 victory over the Mariners. Mo threw the ceremonial first pitch, then closed the game with a 1-2-3 ninth. A-Rod hit a monster shot in the seventh. Melky drove in the go-ahead run in the eighth, putting the Yankees ahead for good.

The Bad

Two words: Brian f-----g Bruney. This guy has been dreadful. He came into the game with a two run lead, gave up 3 consecutive singles to bring the game within one, then allowed the tying run to reach on a sac fly. It isn't clear to anyone why Girardi didn't leave Hughes in for the eighth. Hughes needed only 9 pitches to get through the seventh, and he has been dominant. It would've made sense to leave him in, considering the lead (only 2 runs) and Bruney's recent ineffectiveness. Girardi's new hobby, however, seems to be to piss me off, so he went with Bruney instead.

The Ugly

Through 6 and 1/2, the Red Sox were leading 10-1 over the lowly Baltimore Orioles, whom most last place little league teams pity. The Red Sox bullpen then proceeded to allow 5 runs in both the seventh and eighth innings, then closed out the ninth to win the game 10-11. Holy $#!%. That is ugly, even for Boston, and that is saying something.

We Pay Cash for Home Runs

A-Rod had the only home run for the Yankees, a two run supernova (that's right, it was more than a "blast") to left in the seventh.

Jorge Posada 10hr = $10.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 14hr = $14.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 7hr = $7.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 12hr = $12.00
Brett Gardner 3hr = $3.00
Francisco Cervelli 1hr = $1.00
Total = $113.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Best of the RJG

We received a great suggestion from one of our readers about creating a greatest hits of RJG on the right hand side of our page for new readers to get the full experience of RJG. In order to accomplish this we would like you, the readers, to tell us what your favorite posts are. We have some in mind that we can put up, but we want to know what you all like. So please sound off in the comments section with all the posts you deem worthy. We appreciate it!

Sirius/XM Radio Interview

This from our friends at Sirius/XM:

Today (June 29, 2009) on his daily talk show on SIRIUS XM Radio, former Red Sox manager Kevin Kennedy talked about Mariano Rivera’s 500th career save, which came against the Mets last night at Citi Field.

Kennedy, who managed the Red Sox in 1995 and 1996, recalled being on the receiving end of a particularly dominant performance by Rivera while in his early years as a set-up man for the Yankees.

Kevin Kennedy: “I’ll never forget this as long as I live, it’s a true story: we’re in New York, the old Yankee Stadium, Rivera comes in and he just blows it by Mo Vaughn, [Jose] Canseco, Reggie Jefferson, whoever. He went through us in the seventh and eighth inning like he was facing little leaguers. And you’re talking about the [1995 AL] MVP [in Vaughn]. I’ll never forget after the eighth inning, I think he struck out Mo, and I saw Derek [Jeter] cover his glove over his mouth and Rivera happened to get the ball and look at him, and Derek just kind of shook his head and laughed. Now, he covered his mouth out of respect because he wasn’t laughing at the Red Sox. He was laughing like, ‘I can’t believe how good this guy is, how dominant this guy is. I’m glad I’m not facing him.’ It was a respectful thing. I knew what Derek was doing. It wasn’t about, ‘Oh, we’ve got you guys.’ It wasn’t about that. I’ll never forget that, watching that from the visiting dugout, and I’m thinking the same thing on the bench. Now, all these years later, did I know Rivera would have 500 saves and be able to do this for, you know, 15 years in a row? No, but I did know there was something special we were watching that year in ’96.”

Kevin Kennedy and Jeff Joyce host “Inside Pitch” weekdays (1-4 pm ET) exclusively on SIRIUS XM Radio’s MLB Home Plate channel (XM channel 175, SIRIUS channel 210 with the “Best of XM” programming package).


We don't actually have any friends at Sirius/XM radio, mainly because I lost a lot of money investing in them. It was a risky move, but I was young, and flush with disposable income. It was definitely disposed of. But anyways, this quote is pretty interesting since it shows that Jeter used to laugh at opposing teams, which I always suspected, but never could confirm. Thanks Kevin Kennedy.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

How Dumb Are Non-New York Fans?

During the broadcast of the second game of the Mets series, Leiter and Kay spoke at length about how much more knowledgeable New York fans are (whether Mets or Yankees) than those in other markets. I, however, am not so convinced. I just spent the last two years living in New York, and I listened to a lot of sports radio (better than studying). Here's your average sample of calls to the FAN, with the reason they're calling bracketed:

[A-Rod goes 0-4 in a spring training game]

Ave. Fan 1: Hey Mike, thanks for taking my call. A-Rod is washed up. What do you think of this trade? A-Rod and cash for Johan Santana, Albert Pujols, and Peavey? Also, the Giants will never win a championship with Eli at the helm.

[Sabathia gives up four runs in eight innings in a game the Yankees win]

Ave. Fan 2: Hey Mike, first time long time. First, let me just say that Eli Manning is the worst quarter back in the league, and it is impossible for him to win a Super Bowl, he has no fire. Second, why did the Yanks sign Sabathia? He's killing them. What do you think about this trade? CC Sabathia and Phil Hughes for Evan Longoria and season tickets at the Trop?

As you can see, not only do New York fans completely overreact all the time, they come up with the most insane trade ideas for players that are not only good, they're essential for their team's success. So my question is, how stupid are non-New York sports fans? Like in Kansas City, do people call the local sports station and go, "Hey, where does Grienke get off spelling his name with a 'G'? What an @$$hole!"? I'm just not convinced.

Girardi Over Manages, Yanks Win Anyway

The Good

This one belongs to Mo. He not only recorded his 500th career save (a 4 out save at that), he earned a walk in the top of the ninth to garner his first career RBI. Mo is not only the most feared closer in baseball, he's the most feared hitter in baseball, walking 33% of the time. Not since Babe Ruth have the Yankees been blessed with a player that dominates as both a pitcher and hitter.

The Bad

Wang came in to pitch the sixth inning, and quickly induced a grounder by Gary Sheffield, which, had Wang not attempted to field it, would have easily been the first out. Wang then promptly got the second batter of the inning out, while Sheffield moved to second. Then, inexplicably, Wang was pulled. He wasn't in trouble. He wasn't ineffective. He was pulled anyway. I realize we have a day off, so we don't need to spare the bullpen per se, but that move by Girardi was ridiculous. I suppose they were trying to secure the win for Wang, but I don't like it.

The Ugly

The Yankees have been struggling with a flu-like illness for the past few weeks. Today some Mets players were out with the flu. Have the Yankees resorted to biological warfare? It is certainly a suspicious coincidence.

The Bailout

No home runs tonight, which means a temporary reprieve from mounting debt. Good thing for us, bad thing for charity. Personally, I blame Citi Field's dimensions. Sure we've hit home runs there easily enough, but still, it's a big park.

Jorge Posada 10hr = $10.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 14hr = $14.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 7hr = $7.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 11hr = $11.00
Brett Gardner 3hr = $3.00
Francisco Cervelli 1hr = $1.00
Total = $112.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

The Water Cooler Incident

Recently, Lou Piniella sent Milton Bradley home for crushing a water cooler after another poor at-bat. Apparently there had been a string of water cooler assaults in the Cubs' dugout as of late, and Lou was tired of it.

"Every time I wanted a drink of water, the cooler was laying on the floor, all the water spilt everywhere. I'm f------g tired of not being able to get a drink when I'm thirsty," Piniella explained.

We thought we should ask Milton Bradley for his side of the story, and he had this to say, "That water cooler, it's always mocking me. I strike out, it just stares at me as I get back in to the dugout. I pop out, it's like, 'I'm orange, f--k you!' I couldn't take it anymore, it had to go."

At first, we were certain Mr. Bradley had lost more than a few Connect Four pieces. However, our minds changed when we spoke to Carlos Zambrano. "Yeah, that water cooler is evil," explained Zambrano. "We hate that thing. Lou loves it, because he thinks its funny. The cooler is always saying things about the umpires, and Lou just laughs, but then he says things about us and it hurts, because Lou just laughs."

The orange water cooler was cracked by Milton Bradley, and has since been replaced by a blue water cooler. "I don't know how I feel about this latest cooler," admitted Bradley. "I mean, it doesn't give me lip, but the old one had balls, you know?"

We know, Mr. Bradley, we know.

Yankees Take Second Game Against the Mets

The Good

The worst catcher in baseball, not to mention the Yankees, managed to call a one-hitter. He also hit a three run home run in the 5-0 victory. Somebody trade his ass already.

The Bad

No knob references during the broadcast today. It was a pretty crisp game today, so there's not much to report here.

The Ugly

Your face! Oh snap! You just got faced by your favorite blog. Deal with it.

Homers for Littles

Posada hit one, as did Swisher. A-Rod also had an RBI, but we're not donating money for that.

Jorge Posada 10hr = $10.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 14hr = $14.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 7hr = $7.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 11hr = $11.00
Brett Gardner 3hr = $3.00
Francisco Cervelli 1hr = $1.00
Total = $112.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Yankees Pound Mets

The Good

On Derek Jeter's 35th Birthday, with Derek Jeter out sick (did he have to bring a note?), the Yankees drummed the hell out of the Mets. Three errors by the Mets helped, but our offense, firing once again on all cylinders, destroyed the Mets spirit. They are a broken group of men now.

The Bad

During last night's My9 Broadcast, the camera focused on Nick Swisher, who was drawing on the bottom of his bat with a sharpie. The broadcast then cut back to the game, and then again to Swisher, who was still drawing. David Cone, at that point, said, "Swisher still working on that knob." And I thought, "Really David? Really?" Poor turn of phrase.

The Ugly

Mets defense has to take this one. Three errors in one inning? Fuhgedaboudit!

Cash Contributions

Gardner knocked one out last night, as did A-Rod, who passed Mr. October on the all-time list.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 13hr = $13.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 7hr = $7.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 11hr = $11.00
Brett Gardner 3hr = $3.00
Francisco Cervelli 1hr = $1.00
Total = $110.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Papelbon Controversy

This happened a little bit ago, but I thought I'd discuss it now. Recently Papelbon said he would be willing to sign with the Yankees once a free agent. Then the next day, Epstein made him say he loves Boston and would never play for the Yankees. But the thing is, what Papelbon said was, he'd go to the highest bidder. And you know what? He's right to say that, and if that bidder is the Yankees (please no, one fist pumper is enough), he should sign with New York. I don't get why fans think a player owes it to stay with their team even if management doesn't want to pay them fair market. I'm hardly a laissez-faire type, but the teams make money on players they don't pay fairly prior to free agency, so I don't blame a player for being a "mercenary" when free agent time comes around. They're free agents. They're supposed to sign with whoever pays them the most, that's the whole point.

Happy Birthday Derek Jeter

Today, Derek Jeter turns 35, which in Derek Jeter years is more like 25. Derek Jeter has been, and continues to be, the most dominant shortstop in the game (not to mention, he doesn't need roids, he has natural testosterone levels higher than Floyd Landis's).

One time, when Derek was a toddler, his father was changing the tire of his truck outside their Kansas farm. The jack failed and the truck almost crushed poor Mr. Jeter, but Jeter lifted the car over his head, saving his father.

Another time, Derek was bitten by a spider. No big deal you say? Happens all the time you say? Well, the next day the school bully tried to pick a fight with young Derek, but Derek housed him, delivering a punch that sent the bully flying 20 feet.

Then, of course, there was the time that Derek's best friend was killed by a very large Russian boxer, who then threatened to crush Derek. Derek knocked him out, then delivered a speech, whose theme was change, that humanized the West in the eyes of the Russian populace, and directly led to the fall of the iron curtain.

Today, RJG salutes this great American. Happy Birthday, Derek! May your first child, be a masculine child.

Wasn't Pretty, but It'll Do

The Good

A-Rod had a monster game going 3-4 with a homerun and 4 rbi's. Jeter quite possibly became the greatest leadoff hitter in history by going 4-5 with a walk and 4 runs scored. Damon went 3-4 with a triple and 4 runs driven in, and even Cody Ransom had a good game with the bat. It would appear our offense is coming back.

Aceves and Coke combined for 4.1 scoreless innings in relief. Coke hasn't been great all season, but lately he's been getting the job done. Aceves has been really impressive.

The Bad

Dave Robertson hung a breaking ball that got absolutely crushed. He then couldn't pull it together and had to be pulled for Mariano Rivera. It happens.

The Ugly

Andy Pettitte was absolutely horrible. I'm starting to fear that he'll be the Andy Pettitte from last year rather than the Andy Pettitte from 2007. He been very inconsistant, and apart from a torrid April, has not been giving the Yankees the quality starts he's been known for.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. A-Rod finally got back to contributing to Children's Health, and I have a feeling he will be contributing generously for the rest of the season.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 13hr = $13.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 7hr = $7.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 10hr = $10.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Francisco Cervelli 1hr = $1.00
Total = $108.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Yankees Abandon Strategy, Accidentally Win a Game

The Good

We won a game! I guess my call to Bronny Cash really fired up the troops. The Yankees came to the defense of the embattled (by me) GM of the Yankees, delivering an 8-4 victory over the Braves. Even A-Rod hit with 2 outs and the bases loaded. They clearly love the Cash.

The Bad

Brian Bruney, our much anticipated bridge to Mariano, only managed 2 outs in the eighth, then gave up a run. Mo had to come in for a 4 out save.

The Ugly

Mo came up in the ninth, with the bases loaded and 2 outs. He popped out to right, again failing to drive in a single run. Mo has zero RBI on the season. A DFA or trade cannot be far away.

Cause for Celebration

Today, Franky Cervs hit his first major league home run. In honor of Cervelli, we will donate $1 to the Johnny Damon Home Run Club, which raises money for something. Swisher also hit a home run, as has been pointed out by UK.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 13hr = $13.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 7hr = $7.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 9hr = $9.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Francisco Cervelli 1hr = $1.00
Total = $107.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

The RJG Community Wants Answers, So They're Going to Get Answers

By popular demand, it was time to phone friend of the blog, Yankees General Manager Brian Cashman. With the Yankees struggling (read: blowing hard) lately, it was time to get some answers via satellite video phone. Below is the transcript:

BC: Hello?

RJG: Hey there, Bronny. How's it hanging?

BC: I don't know, why don't you ask your mother.

RJG: Whoa there Bronny. No need to get nasty. Just because you're clearly incompetent when it comes to putting a team together doesn't mean you need to take it out on your good friends at RJG. Besides, you could always call up the GMs for the Nationals or Marlins for advice.

BC: What do you want?

RJG: Um, I don't know, how about for my team to stop getting embarrassed by the ass-end of Major League Baseball. I think that's reasonable.

BC: Well, look. We're going to lose some games here and there, but I'm happy with what we've built and I believe this team is going to make the playoffs.

RJG: You're happy? Happy? With this? You're happy with a team that is 0-8 against their biggest division rival? A team that lost series against the Nationals and Marlins? A team that only took a series from the injury-riddled Mets by a miraculous misplay? Is that what you're happy with?

BC: It's a marathon not a . . .

RJG: What are you Joe Torre now? Torre can use those cliches because he wins. You don't, so you have to give real answers.

BC: Look, our clean-up hitter is not performing right now, one of our front line starters is lucky to give us five innings, another of our front line starters is lucky to give us five innings, and so we are where we are. We can turn this around, but it takes time. Peaks and valleys my friend.

RJG: I understand that, but in fairness, you put this team together. Joba has never been efficient, you completely mismanaged Wang's rehab, so you can hardly put this on the players' under-performance. At what point does the buck stop with the guy who put the team together?

BC: I don't think I like your tone!

RJG: I don't think I like your team!

[Click]

Well there you have it folks. It's just a matter of time before everything starts clicking.

Crystal Guiness Ball Fails Me Again!

The Good

Hughes did a good job pitching in relief. Wang didn't get lit up like he has been all season, but he also didn't really pitch a good game. 5 inning 3 runs is barely passable. There were 4 stolen bases last night as the Yankees really tried to get something going, but alas, the powerful Braves would have none of it.

The Bad

Limp bat syndrome is a rare yet serious condition that afflicts every member of the New York Yankees. With every donation you make to LBS research, we get one step further to figuring out why the Yankees suck.

The Ugly

It turns out you lose every game you score 0 runs in.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. No homeruns once again as the Yankees just aren't all that interested in winning right now.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 7hr = $7.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 9hr = $9.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $105.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Shelley Duncan Should Scissor Kick Someone

The problem with off days is that they provide little material for bloggers to talk about. Most of the time, us bloggers will just recycle old topics like Joba the starter vs. Joba the reliever, why the Mets suck, and whether Gardner or Melky should start at center. The lack of material doesn't just effect us bloggers, but beat writers too. The New York Times, Journal News, and New York Post all have articles about A-Rod. Apparently, he's slumping. One article of interest is this one from the Daily News. Its about how everyones been calling for Posada's head since they think he's a horrible catcher and can't call a game. Apparently, since Burnett can't find the strike zone, Posada can't catch. Never mind that he has a perfect game in his repetoire, and has caught many a gem over the years. Jeter chimes in, since he of course has been receiving the same criticism for years now, but he's been quite a capable shortstop this season, which should shut some people up for now. Basically, are there better shortstops and catchers out there? Yes. Would I want any of them over Jeter and Posada? No. So in conclusion, Shelley Duncan should scissor kick someone in the face. Preferably Perez Hilton.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Yankees End Slumping Ways Today

I used my crystal Guiness bottle to peer into the future and saw an amazing thing: Wang's first win. It was backed by big games from Alex Rodriguez and Mark Teixeira as well as Phil Hughes. I would like to use my crystal Guiness bottle to see who wins the World Series, but that would take all the fun out of it. Here are some random thoughts and observations to keep you warm on a Monday:

-A-Rod is batting .213 on the season, which really isn't helping, but Cano, whose batting over .300, hasn't been able to hit in any sort of pressure situation all season. I wonder if a swift kick in the pants could resolve either of these problems.

-Derek Jeter should not have swung at the first pitch yesterday. It was brutal to lose that way, but he's not entirely to blame. The two homeruns off Tomko and the brutal throw from Melky really did us in.

-Aceves is amazing.

-The Yankees suck right now.

-Why is Angel Berroa still on the team?

-When are Marte and Molina due back? Especially Marte. Wasn't he supposed to be our setup man? Signing Marte for 3 years was a mistake, but who am I to question Cashman especially when he's given us such fine bullpen pieces as Kyle Farnsworth, Jonathan Albaladejo, Jose Veras, Kei Igawa and Edwar Ramirez.

-Scott Proctor would like to come back to the Yankees after he rehabs from Tommy John. I always liked him, so I wouldn't mind it. I always wondered how he'd do with rests in between appearances.

-Robertson really does help this bullpen.

-Does Xavier Nady really think he can reclaim this season, perform at a high level, and sign a big free agent contract at the end of the year? With his elbow, he is a huge risk to any team looking to sign him long term.

-I personally think this Strasburg kid is going to be a huge bust. But he'll probably still shut out the Yankees.

-You know who should be our DH next season? Shelley Duncan.

-Austin Jackson is batting .342 on the season.

-Cody Ransom has been playing games for Scranton. Will he replace Angel Berroa?

-Jesus Montero is batting .300 for Double A Trenton, though he's only had 50 at bats. He has a 4 game hitting streak going 6 for 15 with 2 doubles and 3 RBI's. Not bad.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Yankees Drop Series to Marlins

The Good

The good, the good. I guess scoring five runs was good, as was Aceves in relief. Besides that, not much to report.

The Bad

Derekson Cano, with the tying run at third, swung at the first pitch he saw in the top of the ninth and two outs, promptly grounding out to the shortstop. What a patient team we have at the plate. Additionally, Melky botched a throw to home which led to an additional run in the seventh, the ultimate difference in the game. The entire team let down their fathers today. Good going guys.

The Ugly

CC Sabathia left the game in the second because of tightness in his bicep. What's interesting about that diagnosis is that it isn't a diagnosis, it's barely a description of symptoms. Hopefully, this doesn't lead to Dr. Andrews or surgery. Sabathia has spared our bullpen many a times, but it seems that the eight innings plus a side session he throws every five days has caught up to young Mr. Sabathia.

Home Runs Are for the Children

No home runs today, at least not by the Yankees. Ask Brett Tomko if the Marlins hit any, then call him a piece of $#!%.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 7hr = $7.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 9hr = $9.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $105.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

We're Lazy, So 2 in 1 It Is

The Good

The Yanks are in position to take this series, something they failed to do against the Nationals and Red Sox (all season). Burnett pitched a gem tonight, but so did Josh Johnson, who goes by JJ.

The Bad

After being embarrassed on regional television by the lowly Nationals, the Yankees have put themselves in position to be embarrassed by the slightly less lowly Marlins. Motherf----!

The Ugly

We intercepted this fully self-aware communique from Yankee brass to Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria:

Dear Mr. Loria,

Your half empty stadium looks awful on TV.

Go f--k yourself,

Yankee Ownership (Drafted by J. Girardi)


The Charity That Makes Me Do Math

Melky hit one yesterday, and Posada, who was 0-4, scored our only run tonight, which means no home runs. I think that accounts for all the home runs. If it doesn't, either complain in the comments section or send a strongly worded email to my brother and we'll fix it.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 7hr = $7.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 9hr = $9.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $105.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Links of Note

We have a few links that have been sent to us that we would like to share with you all. Over on Lady at the Bat Radio there's an interview with Charleston River Dog ambidextrous pitcher, Pat Venditte. The man is pretty interesting and its cool that he's doing interviews with fans like this.

I also have a link to a website for a book about the 1978 world series run written from the perspective of a fan titled "The Greatest Comeback Ever". The book sounds interesting, and the sites worth checking out.

Lastly, the Celebrities for Charities foundation is auctioning off two tickets in a luxury suite for a Yankees Red Sox game. The grand prize includes the following:

-Winner will receive 2 Tickets to Yankee Stadium's Legends Suite for the Yankees August 8, 2009 game against the Red Sox. (First Pitch at 4:10 pm)
-Winner will receive 1 nights stay at the Marriott Marquis Times Square in New York City (August 8, 2009, Single Room, Double Occupancy)
-Winner will receive a $250 travel voucher
-Winner will receive a cash prize in the amount of 758.96 to mitigate the
-Winner's tax liability that results from winning the raffle. This prize is withheld and paid, on behalf of the Winner, directly to the IRS ($627.24) and the Commonwealth of Massachusetts ($131.72).

The drawing is on August 5, and its $2.00 per ticket for a minimum of 5 tickets. The proceeds go to Rosie's Broadway Kids, which promotes the arts.

Yankees Foiled By Nationals Pitching

If you watched the series with the Nationals you probably noticed a disturbing trend. The Yankees were dominated by three starting pitchers that normally get pounced on by National League caliber hitters. So what was the problem for such a slugging team as the Yankees? In this RJG exlusive, we got the Yankee hitters to describe their hitting woes against the major leagues worst team.

"It was tough." Began Yankee slugger Alex Rodriguez. "I remember Martis threw this pitch that I just couldn't figure out. It was like, fast. I wasn't sure what to do with it. I asked Kevin Long what I should be doing and he said 'hit it', but I wasn't convinced. I figured I'd err on the side of caution."

"My big issue came against Lannan." Described outfielder Nick Swisher. "He had this one pitch, I think its a new pitch. I've never seen it before. Its hard to describe it in leymans terms, but it kind of moved from one side of the plate to the other almost in a sliding motion. It definitely was sliding. I don't know what Lannan calls this pitch, but I'm just glad I won't have to see it again."

But most Yankee hitters were most confused and frustrated by yesterdays starter Craig Stammen, who pitched a shutout.

"I just remember standing there, and he would throw balls that were in the strike zone. I had never seen anything like it. I asked some of our starting pitchers what that was, and they didn't know either. Burnett had the most confused look on his face. All these pitches in the strike zone. Amazing." Described Johnny Damon.

So there you have it. Yankee hitting problems in their own words.

Yankees Have Epiphany: They Suck

The Good

Generally speaking the pitching was good. Joba gave the Yankees 6 innings and 3 runs, a quality start, and Aceves, Coke and Robertson held the Nationals scoreless over three innings. I wouldn't call it an accomplishment, but its something.

The Bad

The Nationals first three hitters are major league caliber, the remaining 6 are not, how are we losing to this team?

The Ugly

For the second consecutive game, a crappy pitcher has bedazzled the Yankees. The Yankees were shutout and really couldn't muster much against the Nationals. Now we've lost the series, nay, our self respect.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. No homeruns yesterday as the Yankees were really hoping to conserve their hits yesterday.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 9hr = $9.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $104.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

No One Wins When Lannan Pitches

The Good

Damon had a pair of hits including a homerun. Wang threw 5 innings of 3 run ball, which wasn't good, but wasn't bad either. He's at least earned another start and needs to build from there. The bullpen was pretty good too, going 4 innings without allowing a run, including valiant efforts from Hughes, Coke and Aceves.

The Bad

4 hits against the Nationals? Really? When does Jeter come back?

The Ugly

Nationals starter John Lannan pitched 8.1 innings allowing just 2 runs. I wouldn't mind if this were Halladay or Grienke, but John Lannan? At least we can take solace in the fact that he pitched a 1-run complete game against the Mets.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. Johnny Damon and Robinson Cano both had homeruns, but it wasn't enough since those two homeruns were half of the total Yankee hits last night.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 12hr = $12.00
Johnny Damon 14hr = $14.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 9hr = $9.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $104.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Sammy Sosa Tests Positive, Barry Bonds Shocked

It has recently been reported that Sammy Sosa tested positive for a performance enhancer in 2003. While the sports world has largely given it a "yeah, I thought you knew" kind of response, one fan of the game has been devastated by the news.

"When Sosa and McGwire were going on their homerun chase, it was the greatest moment in baseball." Explained former Giants outfielder Barry Bonds. "Sosa was my hero. The last true, and pure hope of the homerun era. Just like me."

Bonds' felt particularly hurt by the news since it tainted so many of Sosa's accomplishments.

"It just hurts you know? Sosa and McGwire motivated me to get into shape and break their homerun record. Only I did it with hard work, flax seed oil, flintstone vitamins, vitamin B shots, and creatine. Sosa did it with performance enhancers and that just taints everything he did. Its a shame since he really motivated me to believe in my dreams, and shoot for the stars."

Though some may argue that that wasn't the only thing Bonds was shooting, the former prolific slugger has yet to test positive for PED's, at least not to the knowledge of anyone outside of a grand jury and those who the leak of said grand jury hasn't reached.

"Look, its a fact of human biology that you grow freakishly strong with age. Its how we live to be 70 or 80. At 40 is when the human body really peaks in physical growth and performance."

"I get my info from doctors." Bonds said as he handed us a pamphlet. "This pamphlet was written by Doctor Joseph Conseco. MD. Put that on your blog (expletive deleted)!"

So Bonds was very shocked by this report even though no one else was. We'll see what impact this has on PED users who are revealed in the near future.

1,000th Post!

The Good

Yeah, the Yankees beat the Nationals with Sabathia on the mound, which really isn't good, its more like a given. The real good is that this here is our 1000th post since the beginning of our blog. If you have read all 1000 of our posts, then, wow, I don't think I've even read all our posts.

Oh, and Cano had 4 hits.

The Bad

We almost lost to the Nationals. That's not cool. Wang's on the mound tonight, and he really needs to show something.

The Ugly

Our captain, Derek Sanderson Jeter, is day to day with a stiff ankle. Though we may have a better glove on the field when Ramiro Pena is at short, we have far less gangster with Jeter out of the lineup.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. No homeruns from the Yankees last night as the Nationals, who are known for their dominant pitching staff, oppressed the Yankee bats.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 11hr = $11.00
Johnny Damon 13hr = $13.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 9hr = $9.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $102.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Monday, June 15, 2009

How The Yankees Break the Cycle of Fear

At this point there is no doubt that the Yankees are deathly afraid of the Boston Red Sox. Though I thought I would never say those words, its pretty clear. The Yankees did fine against their lesser rivals the New York Mets, but against the Red Sox they look like deer in the head lights of a truck driven by murderous ninjas whose sole purpose in life is to kill deers with their deer killing ninja truck. Like most phobias this fear is irrational. Just ask the Rays. Most phobia's can be broken by facing your fears head on, but that hasn't worked for the Yankees thus far, and has in fact served to justify their fears. So now there's only one thing left, and that's to themselves instill fear back into the very object they fear. They must make the Red Sox fear them, and this is how they do it:

It is a well known fact the Red Sox players fear sobriety. So the Yankees just need to swap the Sox's "water" cooler with, well, water. Then when the Sox figure out what's going on and send the bat boy on a beer run, the Yankees must have cops waiting to arrest the 10 year old bat boy holding Josh Beckett's license. Then when the Sox come up to bat, Posada needs to mention how they've really cleaned up well, and that he's happy they're on the wagon. The fear will then be instilled, and they will start to crack. By the third inning the Sox will officially break, and some will make a run for the concessions stands. Because of the long lines at the concession stands, they won't be able to wait for their starter to return and be forced to use the only sober player on their roster to pitch: the towel boy. The Yankees tee off against the towel boy, and win such a lop sided victory that the cycle of fear will have been effectively broken. There's no downside to this plan. The Yankees win, the Red Sox lose, the fear is ended, and beer sales increase 33% for that game.

Friend of the Blog Wants Adam Dunn in All-Star Game

Frequent poster and friend of the blog Fred Trigger is now writing for the Bottom of the Barrel blog. He's currently working on a campaign to get Adam Dunn into the All-Star game. Dunn's a funny player in that he's a perennial 40 homerun hitter, but is also a perennial front runner for most strikeouts in the majors. His default line for a game is 1-4 with a homerun and a strikeout. Either way, Fred's a good guy with a lot of baseball knowledge. Give his site a look.

Yankees Take Series From Mets

The Good

The Yankees exploded for 15 runs on Sunday while Yankee pitching held the Mets scoreless. Burnett threw 7 shutout innings to recover from his horrible embarrasment of a start against Boston. Jeter went 4-4 with 2 RBI's and 2 runs scored.

The Bad

Saturday's game has further solidified my theory that Pettitte sucks this year. Not that he was all that sharp last year, but at least last year he had the whole PED excuse. He had a very sharp April, but has since been declining. I really do hope he pulls it together.

The Ugly

The whole K-Rod and Bruney thing was cute while it lasted, but it now appears to be over. Maybe next time Ryan Church will get scissor kicked by Nick Swisher.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. The Yankees went yard 3 times over the weekend with contributions from A-Rod, Matsui and Cano. Matsui's knees were really bothering him before the game but he mustered the strength to hit a homerun when he was reminded the good it did for children's health.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 10hr = $10.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 11hr = $11.00
Johnny Damon 13hr = $13.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 9hr = $9.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $102.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

This Just In: K-Rod Would Get Knocked Out By Bruney

The recent troubles between Yankees pitcher Brian Bruney and Mets closer Francisco Rodriguez has been reported widely, especially at Pete Abe's blog. The short of it is, Bruney made some comments that he probably should not have, K-Rod said some insulting things back that he probably should not have, and then when they saw each other at today's game, a scrap almost broke out, but it was intercepted by Mike Pelfrey and Jose Veras. K-Rod is an excellent pitcher, but his on the field celebrations and the way he carries himself are obnoxious. If you think Joba and Papelbon are bad, K-Rod is on a whole different level. Personally, I think baseball players shouldn't make comments about other players but what can you do. Either way, I think Bruney would have given it to K-Rod if they did go at it. K-Rod's put on a lot of weight over the years, but Bruney would have handled him.

We'll be back tomorrow with a recap of this weekends games, but for now I'll leave you with an observation that only years of baseball experience could possibly reveal: Santana got rocked.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Meet the She-Fan

On June 17th you have the chance to meet Jane Heller, author of "Confessions of a She-Fan" and friend of the Respect Jeter's Gangster blog. She will be signing copies of her book at Stan's Bar across from the old Yankee stadium between 3:30-5:30pm that day. If you're in the city or are going to the game that day, stop on by and say hello. Jane is an excellent writer, and a huge Yankee fan. For more information about the book signing pay a visit to the Confessions of a She-Fan blog.

I'll Take It

The Good

It was a win, not the cleanest of wins, but at the end of the day it counts in the win column. Jeter, Cano, Teixeira, and Matsui all went yard.

The Bad

After setting an errorless record not too long ago, the Yankees seem determined to set a new record for consecutive games with errors. Sloppy defense is never good.

The Ugly

I don't think there's a worse way to win a game. Two on two outs 9th inning, A-Rod pops up to the second baseman, and wait, no, the second baseman drops it! Two runs score, the Yankees win! It may have been an ugly win, but I take solace in the fact that its an even uglier loss for the Mets.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. The Yankees hit 4 homeruns in last night's game, which is exactly what they didn't do against the Red Sox.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 9hr = $9.00
Derek Jeter 9hr = $9.00
Mark Teixeira 20hr = $20.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 10hr = $10.00
Johnny Damon 13hr = $13.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 8hr = $8.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $99.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Wonderful

The Good

My brother won't have a chance to get to the game review today, which is good for him, because he won't have to relive it.

The Bad

Sorry folks, this one's on Girardi. Sabathia didn't have it in the eighth, he probably shouldn't have been sent out, and he certainly should have been taken out when he gave up a hit to Nick Green. By the time Aceves was called in, it was a very tough spot for a reliever pitching to a very good Sox team. They're patient at the plate and make you throw strikes, not a good formula for two men on and no outs.

The Ugly

This whole #@%&$ing series.

Home Run Count

I don't remember any home runs hit by us last night, but I'm a little too emotionally exhausted to even bother. I'll have my brother update the home run tally later. That's what he gets for making me do all the game reviews.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

I'm Going to Punch the Yankees in the Face

The Good

Really? The "good"? #&*%$@ the Yankees and their children!

The Bad

Hmm. 0-7 is pretty bad. Wang seems to really like the bullpen, because that's where they're sending his arse after this bad, no terrible, start. Clearly he wanted to go back there.

The Ugly

Your face is ugly. Go #$*^%@ yourself.

The Charitable Giving

I didn't bother to check the boxscore, I know Posada hit one to tie it up in the second. But eventually I just tuned out, replacing interest with bitterness.

Jorge Posada 9hr = $9.00
Hideki Matsui 8hr = $8.00
Derek Jeter 8hr = $8.00
Mark Teixeira 18hr = $18.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 12hr = $12.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 8hr = $8.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $93.00*

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

* Total only accounts for Yankee home run totals through the second inning of today's #%*&$@ing disaster.

Disclaimer:

I'm less than pleased with the Yankees right now and I may, or may not, have said some things I didn't mean in this post. Go #$*^%@ yourself.

That Was Embarrasing

The Good

No animals were harmed in the filming of this game.

The Bad

The Yankees got 2 hit, and looked absolutely dominated by the Red Sox. There's no other way to put it, the offense was awful.

The Ugly

AJ Burnett gave us 2.2 innings of 5 run ball. Yes A-Rod had an error that cost them 2 of those runs, but the way AJ was pitching it didn't really matter. He could not throw a strike to save his life, and when he did it was deposited in the centerfield seats or banked off the green monster. Tomko and Veras did decenlty in relief, but the game was basically lost when the starter came up in the 3rd inning.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. No homeruns last night as the Yankees looked like deer in head lights at the plate.

Jorge Posada 8hr = $8.00
Hideki Matsui 8hr = $8.00
Derek Jeter 8hr = $8.00
Mark Teixeira 18hr = $18.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 12hr = $12.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 8hr = $8.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $92.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Yankees Take Series Against the Rays

The Good

The Yanks took a series against a division rival. Pettitte had a quality start, though it would still seem that his back is bothering him. He is old, after all. Hughes looked great pitching an inning of scoreless relief. It would seem that the Joba to the bullpen debate is finally over, since we've found our bridge to Mariano in another pitcher who should clearly be a starter.

The Bad

How long it took us to get this game review up. In fairness, I blame a certain someone who said he would do it when he got to the office. Looks like they finally installed site blocking software at the office.

The Ugly

Matsui running the bases is pretty ugly. You just want to say, "Stop, Matsui! Get on the Rascal, don't use your legs." Seriously, get the guy a Segway already. It's like watching your grandfather try to chase neighborhood kids when this guy is running.

Homers for Kids

The Yankees hit four home runs in yesterday's game, meaning children will receive four more dollars from us. The culprits? Teixeira, Damon, Jeter, Swisher, in that order.

Jorge Posada 8hr = $8.00
Hideki Matsui 8hr = $8.00
Derek Jeter 8hr = $8.00
Mark Teixeira 18hr = $18.00
Nick Swisher 12hr = $12.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 12hr = $12.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 8hr = $8.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $92.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Monday, June 8, 2009

The 2008 Yankees Did This All The Time

The Good

Another come from behind win, which included RBI's from Cano, Posada and Matsui in the 8th to put us ahead by one run. Chamberlain pitched 6 innings allowing 3 runs, and Aceves and Mariano shut things down there after including a 2 inning 4 strikeout effort from Aceves. Swisher hit a homerun.

The Bad

The Yankees looked like they could mount little against Garza and 4 out of the 9 starting players in the lineup went hitless. Its good that we win games like these.

The Ugly

Another throwing error for Posada, which gives him two in a very short period of time. His throwing game seems to be off.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. Nickity Swish hit a homerun early to both tie the game, and contribute to the CHF.

Jorge Posada 8hr = $8.00
Hideki Matsui 8hr = $8.00
Derek Jeter 7hr = $7.00
Mark Teixeira 17hr = $17.00
Nick Swisher 11hr = $11.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 11hr = $11.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 8hr = $8.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $88.00

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Yankees Lose When They Should Have Won!

The Good

Sabathia wasn't good, but he lasted 8 innings. The Yankee offense came up with 7 runs against the Rays but failed to take the lead. Teixeira and A-Rod hit homeruns.

The Bad

Mariano Rivera blew the game in a major way. In a tied game he came in and gave up 4 runs. He looked miserable.

The Ugly

Cano is basically a hitting wasteland when it comes to high pressure situations. He had the opportunity to drive in some runs and he didn't come through. Its a common theme I've noticed throughout this season with him. He is awful in the clutch.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. Teixeira and A-Rod each added a homerun to the cause.

Jorge Posada 8hr = $8.00
Hideki Matsui 8hr = $8.00
Derek Jeter 7hr = $7.00
Mark Teixeira 17hr = $17.00
Nick Swisher 10hr = $10.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 10hr = $10.00
Melky Cabrera 5hr = $5.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 8hr = $8.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $83.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Yanks Rained Out

The Good

No one had to deal with self-important security guards at Yankee Stadium, since the game was called nice and early. Further, the Yankees made use of the National Weather Service. Someone has to. We at RJG prefer to divine the weather through games of dice. It works for us.

The Bad

We at RJG had little to do once the game was called. The Yankees clearly have no regard for their devoted bloggers. Boredom set in quickly once the game was called. We spent most of the day playing beer pong, only more beer and less pong. That was our morning. By the time lunch rolled around we were in no shape to watch a ballgame, let alone review one. We thank the Yankees for cancelling today's game at our behest.

The Ugly

Notice how 'The Bad' didn't make any sense? First we criticize the Yankees for calling the game, later we thank them for it and take credit for the cancellation. Okay, partial credit. But still. Not only that, the entire chronology is all sorts of messed up. First we're playing beer pong after the cancellation, then it's morning all of a sudden. That makes no sense. Thanks a lot Yankees.

The Charitable Giving

No Yankees hit any home runs today. Deadbeats.

Jorge Posada 8hr = $8.00
Hideki Matsui 8hr = $8.00
Derek Jeter 7hr = $7.00
Mark Teixeira 16hr = $16.00
Nick Swisher 10hr = $10.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 11hr = $11.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 7hr = $7.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $85.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Yankees Take the Series

The Good

The Yankees, off of some timely hitting by Teixeira, A-Rod (yeah, that A-Rod), and Melky, won the rubber match and took the series from Texas. Wang, in an extended spring training game, went 4.2 innings, giving up 7 hits and 5 runs, all earned. He threw 69 (stop snickering) pitches and built up arm strength. He will next face the Red Sox this coming Tuesday.

The Bad

Wang had all of two innings in him today. After that, he tired and his pitches ended up higher in the zone as a result. That's what the Yankees get for mismanaging his return from the DL. Bronny Cash has some 'splainin to do.

The Ugly

MLB suspended AJ Burnett for six games for throwing at Nelson Cruz, after Vicente Padilla had hit Teixeira twice. Burnett will appeal, and the prevailing wisdom holds that the suspension will be knocked down one game. The umpire handled this situation correctly, choosing not to warn the benches until the Yanks had had a chance to send a message. That's baseball. MLB has handled this situation poorly. Burnett was apparently suspended for violating MLB rule 702(c)(3), which states players are not allowed to have testicles.

The Bombs

The RJG blog has joined Johnny Damon's Home Run Club, pledging $1 for every home run hit by a Yankee this season. Today, Johnny Damon led off the first with a home run (way to get on base so someone could drive you in @$$#*%!), and Melky put the team ahead for good in some other inning with a two run shot of his own.

Jorge Posada 8hr = $8.00
Hideki Matsui 8hr = $8.00
Derek Jeter 7hr = $7.00
Mark Teixeira 16hr = $16.00
Nick Swisher 10hr = $10.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 11hr = $11.00
Melky Cabrera 6hr = $6.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 7hr = $7.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $85.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Texas Wins One

The Good

Posada's hamstring appears to not be bothering him so much seeing as he went 2-4 with a homerun. Then again, it could be that he's limiting himself to either homeruns or singles because the hamstring is still bothering him, and he doesn't want to have to run that much. Only time will tell.

Tomko pitched 3 scoreless innings in relief. Robertson also pitched a scoreless inning. That's 4 scoreless innings from our bullpen.

The Bad

Pettitte was quite bad going 5 innings and allowing 4 runs. Whether his back is still hurting him is anyone's guess, but I would guess yes.

The Ugly

We lost, and yes, I know we have to lose sometimes, but it doesn't make it any easier.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. Posada hit another homerun since returning from hamstring resting vacation, and adds yet another jack to help get children healthy.

Jorge Posada 8hr = $8.00
Hideki Matsui 8hr = $8.00
Derek Jeter 7hr = $7.00
Mark Teixeira 16hr = $16.00
Nick Swisher 10hr = $10.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 10hr = $10.00
Melky Cabrera 5hr = $5.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 7hr = $7.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $83.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Yankees Win by Blowout

The Good

The Yankees won 12-3 with Jeter and Posada going 3-4 and Posada driving in 4 runs. Burnett pitched a solid 7 innings of 3 run ball, plus Tomko and Veras did not give up the lead.

The Bad

A-Rod sucked yesterday. The only reason he drove in that run was because Mark slid into Adrus so hard. Otherwise it would have been a double play to end the inning.

The Ugly

Mark Teixeira got plunked twice and after the second, he yelled at Texas starter Vicente Padilla. Many began speculating that perhaps their was some animosity between the two from Mark's time in Texas. We at the RJG found out what it was. Apparently when Mark was a rookie there, Padilla had a birthday party, which he invited everyone to except Mark. When he asked Padilla why he didn't get invited, Padilla told him that he looked like a monkey drowning every time he runs. Mark told him he looked like a drunk, which incidentally, he is. Both of them were deeply hurt from this encounter and haven't been friends since.

Respect Jeter's Gangster is for the Children

The "Respect Jeter's Gangster" blog joined Johnny Damon's home run club, which raises money for the Children's Health Fund. We are pledged to donate $1.00 for every homerun the Yankees hit this season. Posada and Matsui both hit homeruns, though Posada was just making up for the fact that he ended the Yankees errorless streak.

Jorge Posada 7hr = $7.00
Hideki Matsui 8hr = $8.00
Derek Jeter 7hr = $7.00
Mark Teixeira 16hr = $16.00
Nick Swisher 10hr = $10.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 10hr = $10.00
Melky Cabrera 5hr = $5.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 7hr = $7.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $82.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

We Can Have Both

Over the last few years there has been a lot of debate over whether Joba should be a starter or a set-up man. Here is an unbiased example of how the debate usually goes:

Fan A: Because he has four major-league ready pitches and can give us innings, we need to give Joba every chance to be a starter. Starting pitching determines post-season viability and that is where Chamberlain's greatest long-term value is.

Fan B: Well I'm drunk and probably of below average intelligence and I say Joba should be in the bullpen. That way we waste his considerable talent. [glug, glug, glug]. Go bullpen! That's where the bulls go.

Fan A: WTF?

Joba's last start, however, should put an end to the debate. Joba was dominant for eight innings, allowing only one run on a solo shot by Victor Martinez. This means that Joba can start and pitch the eighth, setting up Mariano as he did last night. Thus, it would seem this debate is settled. Joba should start and he should continue to pitch through the eighth.

Monday, June 1, 2009

The Greatest Defensive Team Ever Put Together By Brian Cashman

The Good

The Yankees end their road trip 5-2 with another win over the Indians. Joba pitched 8 innings of one-run ball and made a great defensive play, diving to catch a bunt popped up by Kelly Schoppach (?) and then throwing out a runner at second. Mo closed out the game and made an impressive over the shoulder catch and throw to first to end the game. Additionally, Nick the Swish had two doubles. Hopefully he's breaking out of his malaise. With the win, the Yankees broke the record, formerly held by the 2006 Red Sox, for consecutive errorless games played. When asked about it by Kim Jones after the game, Nick Swisher clearly had no idea his team had been closing in on a record. Girardi also claimed to have been unaware of the record when he was asked about it after the game. Way to keep up with the news, Yankees.

The Bad

The Yankees loaded the bases in the sixth with no outs but did not manage to drive in a single run. They couldn't even muster a sac fly, or sac infield single. All in all, they had no sac in the sixth (pun intended, though admittedly, it works better aurally).

The Ugly

After Joba turned his amazing double play in the fifth, he let loose a fist pump, single-handedly ruining the game of baseball. The league officially folded, being denied any TARP funds from a Congress too afraid of the political repercussions of allowing a league that gives a stage to delinquent fist-pumpers to exist. The Yankees will now return home to face Texas in a game of frisbee-golf, since Joba utterly ruined the game of baseball, making it impossible to play ever again. Thanks a lot, fist pump!

Performance Incentives

In a bid to get the Yankees to hit home runs, RJG has joined Johnny Damon's Home Run Club, pledging $1 for every home run hit by a Yankee this season. Unfortunately for children everywhere, no home runs were hit today by the Yankees. I hope they can't sleep tonight.

Jorge Posada 6hr = $6.00
Hideki Matsui 7hr = $7.00
Derek Jeter 7hr = $7.00
Mark Teixeira 16hr = $16.00
Nick Swisher 10hr = $10.00
Robinson Cano 9hr = $9.00
Johnny Damon 10hr = $10.00
Melky Cabrera 5hr = $5.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 7hr = $7.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $80.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.

Career Day at the RJG

So you want to be a ball player, but don't have much talent. No need to worry. We at the RJG have your back. At career day with the RJG, we will outline how you can have a major league career, while not being that good a player. There are some positions that are always in demand, and certain positions that teams are always willing to take a chance on despite previous track record. Here is everything you need to know about carving out a career in the majors.

Supplying the Demand

Its no thing for an Alex Rodriguez, Albert Pujols, or Derek Jeter to make a major league career. They have talent. But there's no need to worry because if you follow these steps, you could be calling an Alex Rodriguez, Albert Pujols or Derek Jeter your teammate. First, you need to know what positions are always in demand. These three positions will keep you employed forever: catcher, shortstop/second baseman, and left handed releiver. Lets break down each one.

Catcher

For every Jorge Posada, Joe Mauer, and Geovany Soto in the game, there's probably a dozen Koyie Hill's, Kevin Cash's, and Kelly Stinnet's. The good thing about catchers is that they're typically not expected to be able to hit. This goes double for backup catchers. Though its easily the toughest position in the game, its also the one that's always in need. Every season teams have at least one backup catcher on the team, and one in the minors. For example, the Yankees had Molina on the bench and Kevin Cash in triple A. If you know how to call a game, and have a strong arm, this position could be for you. Even if you can't hit, and you run like you're pulling a tractor.

Shortstop/Second Baseman

This position is a little more complex since it requires more athletecism and agility than most other positions. The good thing is, shortstops and second baseman aren't expected to hit well, which makes a major league career much more tenable for those who aren't so good. Plus, if you're a shortstop or second baseman you can easily be trained to play first or third base. If you do that, you become a utility player, and that will land you a job anywhere. Don't believe me? Just ask Nick Green, Miguel Cairo, and Wilson Betemit.

Left Handed Relievers

There's not many of them, which makes them a luxury. You don't have to be a shut down player either. If you happen to be left handed and throw out of the bullpen, you'll find yourself getting signed year in and year out. The main requirement for this position is of course, being left handed, but you'll get extra points if you can regularly get left handed batters out. Some left handed relievers of note: Ron Villone, Mike Myers, and Scott Schoeneweis.

Prettying Up the Resume

When creating a resume your goal is not just to outline your previous work experience, but also to show a potential employer something that sets you apart from the pack. In baseball, there are a few things that can pretty up your resume, even if you don't have much experience: being a left handed batter, being a switch hitter, and playing multiple positions. If you're stuck on being a right handed hitter, then learning a new position is the way to go. So you're an infielder? Learn to play an outfield spot. You're a catcher? Flash some leather at first. If you're a pitcher, just stick to pitching, but maybe work on your stamina and show that you can be used as a long releiver every now and again. This gives teams more options, and the more options you give a team, the more likely they are to sign you.

Finances of a Baseball Career

The thing about a sports career is that they're undoubtedly short. Where I can work a desk job well past my 60's, extending a baseball career past your 40th birthday can prove tricky. Besides age catching up with you, sometimes you just run out of teams who want to sign you. Perhaps there's a down turn like there was this last season, and carrying an extra catcher or infielder doesn't sound too appealing for a major league club. Well, there's three steps you will want to take to cover your bases (pun intended) and set up a career after you retire.

A Millions A Good Goal

Though most players may call 300 wins or 3000 hits the greatest milestone you can reach, the truth is that the greatest milestone you can reach is free agency. For a fringe player, arbitration is a good goal too, but free agency will generally get you more money. The reason is, once you reach free agency, you are free to shop your services around to any club. Many fringe players find themselves signing with new teams each year, and may spend a whole season in the minors, but hey, at least they're employed. You're biggest goal when you get called up is to stay called up (easier said than done). The major league minimum pay is $390,000 a season. That's the minimum. A good goal to reach is your first $1 million contract. Depending on how you spend your first million, you could seriously set your family up for a long time. As long as you don't try to keep up with the Jeter's, you can make that money last.

Making a Million Count

Just think about it: $1 million may look more like $600,000 after you pay your agent and your taxes. The first step is to get any idea of living in New York city, or in any city for that matter out of your head. If you're a fringe player, you may not even be playing next season, so you have to be smart. Now, I'm going to assume that you want to be smart with your money, but that hanging out with major leaguers all the time will compel you to spend more than say, me. No problem. With $600,000, you can easily buy a nice house for $300,000. Not in New York mind you, but down south and in mid west, $300,000 goes a long way house wise. Now lets say that you pour $30,000 into the house to fix it up, and install a batting cage. Lets also say that you decide to buy yourself and your wife a lower level luxury car for $35,000 a piece. You've now spent $400,000. Let's also say you set aside $50,000 for each of your two kids college funds, and tell them that they're going to a public school. You have $100,000 left in the bank for the year, and you have your house, cars, and children's colleges paid for. If you've carved your existance in the minors making minor league money, your first million could really secure you and your family for a long time. Just think about how much money and time we normally spend paying mortgages and car notes. What normally would take 30 years to pay took you one paycheck, and you could easily go cheaper.

No Team Will Sign Me What Should I Do?

The great thing about baseball is that its slowly growing abroad. If you're willing to travel, playing in Japan is a great option, and in some cases could be more lucrative. Just ask Darrell Rasner the former Yankees starter, and current Tohoku Rakuten Golden Eagles pitcher. After a few seasons riding the Scranton shuttle, Rasner signed for a guaranteed $1.2 million in Japan for 2 years, with the potential to make $3.5 million from incentives. Not a bad deal. Now not everyone will get a deal like this, but if you can sign over seas, its at least a job, and some income coming your way.

I Want to Retire, What's Next?

Lets say you spent 10 years carving an existance in baseball, and made $2.5 million in that time. Though its small when compared to other players salaries, its way more than most of us would make in 40 years. If you've been smart with your money, you can make it last. Especially when you don't have to pay a mortgage, a car note, and have your children's colleges paid for. However, there's some extra jobs you can take even after your playing career is over.

Many former players become managers, and instructors for minor league teams. If you're good teaching and handling a clubhouse, this would be a good position for you. Are you willing to travel, and speak spanish? Look for jobs as an instructor at one of the many baseball schools in Latin America. Have a keen eye for talent? Talk to your front office about pursuing a career as a scout. If all that fails, hire yourself out as a personal coach. Advertise yourself as a former player with big league experience. You can charge between $100 - $500 an hour easily, and you can put that batting cage you installed in your house to work. If you pick up a few clients and work 20 hours a week, that's $2000 at least, which is about $104,000 a year. I bet you could find a way to live off that. If you were part of a championship team, you can spin that into speaking engagements and guest appearances for many years to come. If you're living in your hometown, do a few commercial spots for the local furniture store.

One more important thing. While you're in the majors, make as many friends as you can. Especially with the wealthier ball players. You may suddenly find yourself on yachts and golf outings that you paid nothing for.

So there you have it. You can make a career in the majors even if you're not the best player to live. Of course, none of this information is reliable since we are not a career service, have no major league experience, and basically pulled everything out of our rears, but hey, its Monday.