Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Increase of Unassisted Triple Plays Attributed to Rampant Fist Pumping

I read this article on where the author addresses the dramatic increase of unassisted triple plays in major league baseball. The author questions why we have had so many, relatively speaking, when whole generations of baseball fans have lived without seeing one. The only way to fully understand this phenomenon is to look at environmental causes. In other words, what in the evironment of baseball is different now, than it was in the past? The only viable answer is the fist pump.

"Look there is nothing more thrilling than the unassisted triple play fist pump." Said Asdrubal Cabrera, the latest player to turn an unassisted triple play. "I ran back into the dugout, I could barely contain myself. I was about to do it, but Dellucci stared me down. I ran into the clubhouse hallway to be out of site, and I fist pumped like never before. It was such a violent fist pump, I uppercutted the ceiling light. Sparks and chards of light bulb were falling around me, as I kept thrusting my fist and screaming 'YEAH!' in one continuous long glorious yell."

"I can remember my unassisted triple play fist pump like it was yesterday." Said long time Red Sox player and retired veteran John Valentin. "It was back in 1994. I woke up that morning and my fist was glowing. I could feel the energy, and I knew something amazing was going to happen. When I turned that triple play, I started my fist pump from the ground. I just ran my knuckles across the ground and came up big with it, thrusting it way up into the air. The feeling, man, I just can't explain it. Some go an entire career without feeling it, some claim to feel it when they haven't, but for me, I felt it, there's no fairy tale to this story. The unassisted triple play fist pump is real."

"I live for an unassisted triple play fist pump." Said White Sox shortstop Orlando Cabrera. "I can only dream it will happen."

So there you have it. Joba Chamberlain and his rampant fist pumping is to be blamed for the increase in unassisted triple plays.


TribeGirl said...

Didn't want to gloat about it or anything, this being a Yankees blog, but you gotta respect Cabrera's gangster on that play - and he SHOULD have fist pumped right on the field ala Joba - you KNOW he wanted to - screw Delucci!

TribeGirl said...

Holy crap! Who's the Sox fan on here? Trigger? Did you see that play Manny made in LF today? WOW! I love him!!!

Fred Trigger said...

im so glad I had a DVR at work!!! I kept showing it to everyone there, while laughing my ass of. Shame on Aubrey Huff for still getting thrown out.

Anonymous said...

Have fun.