Saturday, May 16, 2009

A-Rod Is Magic

The Good

My brother and I attended that game, which is always good. Joba managed to not give up any runs in the first. Teixeira went four for four, with a three run home run, and a walk. And, of course, A-Rod hit a walk-off, two run, blast to left field in the eleventh. The crowd gave A-Rod a very long ovation. He definitely felt appreciated and I suspect he cried a little afterwards.

The Bad

The Yankees have a fan poll at the beginning of every game where you can text your response and then they announce the winner later. Today's question was, what is your favorite Yankees rivalry? The choices: A. Red Sox; B. Mets; C. Minnesota. We don't have a rivalry with Minnesota. Does any Yankee fan honestly care about the Mets? I know Mets fans are obsessed with us, but we don't care about them. Stupid question all around.

The Ugly

After last night's game, Melky Cabrera got a towel full of shaving cream in the face. Today, after the crowd showered A-Rod with love, and as A-Rod began his interview with YES's Kim Jones, AJ Burnett creamed Alex with a shaving cream towel of his own. Unbeknownst to AJ, A-Rod is deathly allergic to shaving cream. His face immediately swelled up, and team trainer Gene Moynahan immediately injected him with an EpiPen. A-Rod had to be rushed to the hospital, where a team of doctors played his ovation over and over again in a loop until he felt better.

Respect Jeter's Gangster Is for the Children

RJG joined Johnny Damon's Home Run Club for Children Who Like Home Runs and Need Money for Stuff. We will donate $1 for every home run hit. Today, Marky T and A-Rod both hit home runs.

Jorge Posada 4hr = $4.00
Hideki Matsui 4hr = $4.00
Derek Jeter 5hr = $5.00
Mark Teixeira 8hr = $8.00
Nick Swisher 8hr = $8.00
Robinson Cano 6hr = $6.00
Johnny Damon 9hr = $9.00
Melky Cabrera 4hr = $4.00
Jose Molina 1hr = $1.00
Alex Rodriguez 2hr = $2.00
Brett Gardner 2hr = $2.00
Total = $52.00

If you are interested in Johnny Damon's Homerun Club or the Children's Health Fund you can find links to both at the top right hand corner of our page.


anonymous number two said...

Those of us watching from home know it was whipped cream.

Roberto Alejandro said...

no, it was shaving cream, I know because our inside man got a hold of the towel and analyzed its contents biochemically speaking.

Raven King said...

Alexander Emmanuel Rodriguez, the world's biggest Drama Queen.
Allan James Burnett, the world's highest-paid whipped cream pie smasher.
It's very nice to have them both on this team.

Roberto Alejandro said...

The AP agrees with us that it was shaving cream.

anonymous number two said...

Obviously, a Truth Commission is in order here. YES's Kim Jones said it was whipped cream. Alex didn't want it wiped off his face noting he was hungry, even he isn't so pathetic as to nosh on shaving cream, I hope. AJ said it was whipped cream. Selena Roberts is investigating.

She-Fan said...

Glad you guys got to be at that game. It must have been exciting - shaving cream, whipped cream or whatever!