Wednesday, July 25, 2012

A-Rod Out with Fracture in Loss to King Felix

The Good

Freddy Garcia had a strong start, keeping us in the game and giving Girardi a chance to overmanage. Girardi was really happy about that.

The Bad

The Yankees lost to the Seattle Mariners. Yes, those Seattle Mariners. The ones in Seattle, Washington. Granderson hit a home run and we still lost. How? One word: intimidation.

The Ugly

A-Rod had his hand broken on an inside changeup. Three hitters in all were hit, and though none of the HBPs may have been intentional, there still has to be consequences for pitching inside when you don't have control, and there weren't any. Even worse, the Yankees basically apologized for King Felix after the game. That's worse than when Obama apologized for America that time the Republicans made up.

We Still Reached the Babies

Curtis Granderson made sure this loss wasn't a loss for the babies, since babies are needy. $2 more for them.

Raul Ibanez 12hr = $24
Nick Swisher 14hr = $28
Andruw Jones 12hr = $24
Derek Jeter 7hr = $14
Curtis Granderson 27hr = $54
Alex Rodriguez 15hr = $30
Robinson Cano 22hr = $44
Mark Teixeira 19hr = $38
Eric Chavez 8hr = $16
Russell Martin 10hr = $20
Jayson Nix 3hr = $6
Dewayne Wise 3hr = $6

Total 152hr = $304

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

That's it? I expected more funny news analysis about the Ichiro trade and A-Rod incident.

Fernando Alejandro said...

Forthcoming!

Rich Mahogany said...

RJG feels the pain of every injured Yankee, and can only write something humorous after the weeping ends. A broken hand is painful.