Monday, October 22, 2012

Cash Gets a Call

With the Yankees contemplating their future, it was time for us to give good friend of the blog another call. Last time got a little bit awkward, but we needed to make sure someone was being honest with Bronny about what a suck-bag of crap his team was. The following is a transcript of our conversation:

BC: Hello?

RJG: Hey Bronny, how's it hanging?

BC: Could you stop asking me that? It's kind of personal.

RJG: You're not going to get all sensitive on me again, are you?

BC: I have a right to express my emotions.

RJG: Whatever. Are you aware that your team is a suck-bag of crap?

BC: That's not a thing. It doesn't even make sense.

RJG: Your roster-building philosophy doesn't make sense.

BC: Watch it.

RJG: You used to be a ninja! The old Bronny Cash would have traded A-Rod, re-signed Ichiro and Mo, traded for Justin Verlander and lowered payroll by now!

BC: There is no way any of that could ever happen.

RJG: You know what, Bronny? You don't deserve to be called Bronny Cash. Your new nickname is Lyin' Crapman. What do you think about that?!

BC: It does rhyme with my real name.

RJG: You're not acknowledging my anger! Why won't you acknowledge my anger?!

BC: I find it's best not to play into the anger of others; it creates unhealthy relationship dynamics.

RJG: Signing A-Rod to a 10 year contract creates unhealthy relationship dynamics.

BC: How dare you! You know that wasn't my call!

RJG: Wasn't it?

BC: Why do you always try to hurt me? [soft sobbing]

RJG: I'm sorry Bronny. I didn't mean it. It's just that you're a bad GM who won't acknowledge my anger.

BC: It's not all about you, RJG. Ha!


There you have it folks, as we head into winter, the Yankees are determined to get better for next year.


Rich Mahogany said...

Bronny played you like a fiddle and is warming up to take on other GMs.

Assuming Swisher is gone, I would like to see Ichiro back if he will take a reasonable deal - two years max, preferably one. Granderson comes back for one more year and we hope for a healthy season for Gardner. Jones is probably gone and Ibanez is a bad bet at age 41, so we will be sorting through castoffs again for extra outfielders.

Fernando Alejandro said...

Here's a word from an article over at the Lohud blog:

Once again, Cashman said that Kevin Long will not be fired because of the postseason letdown. “Kevin Long is without question one of the best hitting coaches in the game,” Cashman said. “And what took place here is a collective failure, not an individual one, and no one is going to be pointed at as a scapegoat.”

Roberto E. Alejandro said...

I'm surprised by the Long quote, but we'll see if ownership feels the same. It should be pointed out that the Yankees hitting troubles with RISP are season long, they just got magnified in the postseason.

Fernando Alejandro said...

I'm telling you, the scapegoats are A-Rod, Granderson, and Cano, and the reason for their problems are age (A-Rod), lack of natural hitting ability (Granderson), and laziness (Cano). All of which are blamed on the player and not on the hitting coach.

Roberto E. Alejandro said...

The entire team struggled all year to hit with RISP, you can't pretend the hitting coach has nothing to do with that.

Rich Mahogany said...

If there was a "collective failure" of hitting, isn't it possible that the failure was due to bad coaching?

Uncle Mike said...

If the Old Boss were calling the shots, Kevin Long would have been fired by the Yankees 4 years ago -- and by the Mets this year.

Fernando Alejandro said...

Do we then credit Long for their ability to hit with RISP last season, or the season before?

Anonymous said...

the issue isn't whether he should be fired, but whether he wil. I think he will, the hitting issues will ultimately fall on him, fair or not.


Anonymous said...

I agree. The fact that the entire line up was swinging for the fences was not a good sign, particularly when it stopped working for them. Other teams have pitchers and pitching coaches that know a thing or two about the game and other teams' weaknesses. I can't see Long coming back.