Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Cano Responds to Threat of Stegosaurus Playing Second in 2009

Second Baseman Robinson Cano has had an overwhelmingly dissapointing season, easily the worst of his career. Since getting benched about a week ago for not going hard after a grounder, he has been stepping up his game. He has a 6-game hitting streak going and has knocked in a run in each of the last 4 games. Was it the benching that got Cano going, or was it something else?

"After I heard about Hank's plans for the 2009 Yankees, I realized that I've been taking my position for granted. Joe sat me down the day he benched me and showed me footage of Stegosaurus Randolph fielding grounders at second. He then showed me Stegosaurus Randolph hitting a walk off double to lead Trenton to their championship. It was then that I finally realized that I'm not Derek Jeter. I can be replaced." Discussed Robinson Cano.

Former Trenton player and current Yankee phenom, Phil Coke shared his thoughts about his former teammate Stegosaurus Randolph.

"Early on, Stegy had some of the same concentration issues Cano had. Stegy didn't have his mind in the game at all times. Sometimes, in the middle of an inning, he'd wander into the outfield and start chewing the grass. Just like Cano used to." Explained Coke.

But Stegosaurus made some major strides in his concentration, and as a result his hitting took off.

"I have to admit, early on, ground balls would roll right by Stegy. I even saw a ball hit him in his side and he just stood there chewing a tree branch one of his handlers gave to him. It was really frustrating as a pitcher." Continued Coke. "But after a sit down talk with Julius, he's really stepped his game up." Coke said referring to Trenton coach Julius Matos. "Since then, Stegy's been turning doubleplays with reckless abandon, his average went from the low .000's to .300 over the course of a few months."

This kind of turn around is exactly what has alluded Robinson Cano this season, and is what the Yankees will expect for 2009. But could we see Stegosaurus in pinstripes next season?

"I'm not confirming or denying anything right now." Answered Yankees General Manager Brian Cashman. "He's earned a callup to Scranton, and from there, the organization will evaluate his progress, and make a decision when the time is right."

Robinson Cano is not taking any chances.

"I'm happy for Stegosaurus Randolph's succes, but he's not taking my spot here. Next season, I'm winning a batting title, winning the comeback player of the year, winning the Roberto Clemente Award, a Cy Young, a Gold Glove, an MVP, an Emmy, a Source Award, and a World Series. Listen here Stegy. You come at the king, you best not miss!"


Anonymous said...

uh oh.. who else is left to lose their position?

TribeGirl said...

George Bush just ended his TV speech and said "May God Bless You" but did not say "God Bless America." With a few months left, he's slipping....

I don't get this whole David Blaine hanging upside down is a magic trick thing? NY is weird. In Cleveland, magic is driving on the Interstate over all the potholes and not effing up your car or getting in a wreck.

Sorry, I don't know anything about dinasours.

Roberto E. Alejandro said...

in my opinion Bush has been slipping for 8 years. anyway, david blaine isn't exactly a magician, more of an eccentric showman. As for the dinosaurs, the stegosaurus playing second could be cool. imagine a player tries to take a hard slide to break up the double play and the stegosaurus just eats him. or what if he gets called strike three and he just takes the base anyway? What's the ump going to do? Get eaten? No, he'll just let him take the base. He could be our new lead off hitter. This plan can't fail.