Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Zach Grienke is Looking to Destroy the American League
This just in. Royals pitcher Zach Grienke has set his sights on the destruction of all Major League teams. After years of pent up frustration as a pitcher for one of the worst ball clubs in the Majors, Grienke finally snapped and decided to take his revenge out on the rest of baseball. This revenge has taken form in Grienke's 4-0 record in 4 starts and a competitive yet balanced 0.00 ERA. He's pitched 29 innings including two consecutive complete games, and has struck out 36 batters. He walked 6 batters in that time, but then threatened to eat their children so they wouldn't score. Tonight Grienke sets his sights on the winningest Blue Jays, whom Grienke has decided will end their winning ways now. If you see this man, avoid eye contact and make sure your estate is in order.