Saturday, August 30, 2008

You Rang?

Deron was a shortstop in the Yankees minor league system back in 1995 when a PED scandal ended his career. He brings an insider’s perspective to our blog.

I guess there's at least one reader of this blog with some good taste. As for the rest of you, how's rehab going? I don't want to assume, but I have to imagine a bunch of guys who actually think that Jeter can play shortstop and like to refer to him as a gangster have done their fair share of crack cocaine.

I figured I'd write a season review come October while I watched competent baseball teams play this game in a manner worthy of its storied history, but I guess I can give you a preview.

April: Yankees Sucked

May: Yankees Sucked

June: Yankees Sucked

July: Yankees great for 8 games, then they sucked

Well, you get the point. I guess it's not really the Yankees fault. I mean, they just unceremoniously got rid of the greatest manager in baseball over the last 12 years, made no real attempt to get better, ran a bunch of AA pitchers out as part of their five man rotation, hired a manager with far less ability than Torre, fielded a line up consisting mainly of aging players that used to hit but whose cataracts now make that increasingly difficullt, and then ruined Joba's shoulder by horribly mismanaging his professional pitching career.

But it's not their fault. It was clearly the injuries. If by injuries you mean sheer incompetence. And if by sheer incompetence you mean sheer incompetence.

What's with Jeter's flat top fade by the way? Did he never get over the end of Kid-n-Play's careers? Totally in love with the Dick Tracy bad guy? It doesn't make any sense. Much like pretending he's a great shortstop. The sabermetrics don't lie. Jeter has the range of an 85 year old hip replacement candidate and only got to the big leagues because he'll nail anything that moves. You know it, I know it. Now the blogosphere knows it. If by blogosphere you understand the 8 or so people who read this blog.

Anyway, in conclusion, the Yankees suck. Thanks for reading my post on this lovely blog. In all seriousness, however, this is a great blog. And by great I mean that I'm still waiting for my cut of the advertising revenue. You cheap mofos, give me my money! Now!

5 comments:

michael kei said...

Sweet. I'm one of the 8 who know it!

Roberto Alejandro said...

welcome back mr. Kei, it's been a while!

raven said...

This team is the baseball version of "Any Given Sunday".
A new boss.
An aging Captain.
The legendary manager has just put an end to his new team's eight-game losing streak with the help of his Willie Beamensome.

raven said...

Beamen.

Fernando Alejandro said...

Wow, Kei welcome back! Where have you been? I was just thinking about you and tribe girl. You both dissapeared about the same time. I assumed you were fighting crime together somewhere.

I never saw Any Given Sunday, but if I had to liken this season to any movie it would be Signs, only because of the horrible ending.